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If Desmon isn't dead, he will be after that. I rush through the convent and set fire to as much as I can before I'm hustling out. I see Mother Superior with all the other sisters and Father Joseph huddled together. All crying as their home goes up in flames and I make off, quite literally, like a thief in the night.
I spare one glance at the head nun, "Protect her." I say, and she furrows her eyebrows until they smooth out a second later, and she nods.
Right now, that's the absolute best that I can do. I have to leave her in order to find my way back to her. I only hope Inessa will still be here when I'm able to return.
15
Inessa
Wakingup the next morning is hard. Not only because I'm in pain, but because I didn't feel Zeus come back to me all night. My mind races with thoughts of him being somewhere hurt or worse. I don't even have the number he gave me to reach out to him. It's at the convent. I don't want to believe that he'd leave me after what we've been through, but I can't lie and say that all this hasn't been a tough to bear.
It's a situation that might have broken anyone, so I can't be too mad at him if he did choose to leave.
Last night he held me so tenderly, not like someone who was annoyed, but like someone who was determined to make me feel better. I did get the letter that told me that he was going to take care of this Mr. Imbue. That same letter also said that he would be back. I'm not sure what to believe right now.
I could reach out to the police about what's going on, but there's a good chance that it could get Zeus in trouble as well. Even if he left me here on my own, I wouldn't want to do that.
I could go back to the convent and find out what is going on there, but that would mean that I'd run the chance of running into that man and anyone else that he managed to bring to the convent. It's a dangerous thought.
My mind wanders to the last time I had a dangerous thought, except it wasn't about being killed, it was about letting Zeus take me.
I never admitted it to him, but I loved the way it felt when his hands would wrap around my neck while we were having sex. He took all choice away from me, and I was happy to let him do it.
Even while I lay here with my back throbbing in agony, I get wet at the thought of Zeus touching me.
My hands quickly dive under the sheets and I indulge myself one last fantasy of the man who brought me out of my shell.
"My little lamb..."
I can hear his voice so perfectly in my mind, and I turn in the bed and smell his scent on the pillow. I remember his rough hands skimming over my skin and the way his lips curled up in a smile. The man was bad for me in a way that was just so right. I should've told him. I rub the tight nub at the pinnacle of my slit and my body tenses up quickly.
I come, but nowhere near as hard as I'd be able to come if I were with Zeus right now. The man seemed to be fluent in my body since the first time he laid hands on me.
Tears spring to my eyes, and they roll down my cheeks as I come to grips with the fact that there's a real possibility that I may never see him again. The both of us lost to time and circumstance. At least I got a great experience and story out of it. That will have to do for now.
***
I stay in the Airbnb for another three days while my body heals up, and I wait for Zeus to come back or for someone to come tell me that he's all right. The longer that we go without any communication, the more upset I get. Anger, then desperation and finally just acceptance.
I do my best to clean up the rental house as best I can as I get ready to go out into the real world. After everything that went down that night with me and the rest of the members of the congregation, there's no way that I'd ever be able to commit myself to a life that allowed something like that to happen. I'd joined up for the wrong reason's anyway.
There is a knife in the nightstand that I'm assuming Zeus left here, that I take with me as I make my way to the convent. It's actually a lot warmer now that the cold front has gone away. Still, I only have the clothing that Zeus left in the closet to wear. I can't put the habit back on, not when I can't dedicate myself to the life like I should.
The clothes are extra baggy on me, and it makes me look homeless. I guess that's what I am. Now that I'm not with the order, I don't really have a place in life. I'm not too down about it, though. I'm sure I'll make a way.
When I round the corner that leads to the road to the convent, my mouth goes slack, and I run the last bit of distance. Large clouds of smoke come wafting up from the structure that I can see even through the trees.
"No! What happened!" I say to no one but myself. When I get to the gate, I see the destruction for myself.
The entire convent save the west side of it and the courtyard is nothing but tinder and charred wood.
Despair squeezes at my heart as my mind envisions Zeus at the bottom of all this mess, dead. That would be one of the reasons for him not to show up like I think he would have. Of course, my first assumption that he was just fed up with the bullshit that I had in my life or that he just wanted to get another notch on his belt is viable too.
I look around for anyone to tell me what happened here and even though I see a few firefighters I don't see anyone from the church itself. My eyes glimpse a bright red sign on the gate a little farther down. When I go investigate, it says that there's a temporary housing for the sisters and Father Joseph not too far from here. I'm so glad I nearly skip in the direction the sign makes reference to.
When I get to the small bookstore, I see all the sisters and Mother Superior are helping to reorganize the place. Always work to be done.
"Sister Inessa?" Sister Joan calls out when she sees me walk into the store. For the first time since I'd joined the order, everyone rushes over to me and embraces me. They hug me as if I'm their long-lost sister who has just returned.
