AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I didn’t want any feelings or anything else attached to this conversation.
“Hey.” She breathed out and…did she sound happy to hear from me, or was that just me?
I could hear someone in the background singing, and a boyish laugh echoing through the phone. Then Bexley went and nearly did me the fuck in with a giggle.
“Baby Bell, keep it down. Momma’s on the phone.” Her voice was muffled, likely due to a hand over the speaker, as she laughed.
I couldn’t stop the smile growing on my face as I pictured them there, laughing together, at what sounded like Bella singing. My chest suddenly felt hollow as I realized there wasn’t anywhere else I wanted to be except there with them.
“Sorry about that, Bella is trying to sing to her brother to make him feel better, but when she sings, she gets very serious. Like, diva status, with dead-serious looks and even more serious dance moves,” Bexley explained, giggling in between each word.
“This sounds like something I need to see,” I joked back, because dammit, why did my heart feel like this? These were another man’s kids. These wereBexley’skids.
“Well, you’re invited to come watch—the kids have already asked about you a few times. I mentioned I would see you tonight to talk, but that didn’t exactly excite them when they realized we’d be leaving to have our conversation.” She laughed into the phone again, and it was like some poetic shit, like someone had opened the clouds, letting the sun shine through.
“About that conversation…” I cleared my throat.
“Yeah?” she asked, sounding wary. Did she know I was going to bail on her? She probably did; she knew I was a coward…always had been. The conversation with my mother flickered into my conscious.How did you react when she told you?
“I was thinking maybe we could do dinner altogether, and then you and I…we could talk after they go to bed, or on the porch while they watch a movie or something?”
My heart rate spiked, waiting for her to turn me down, but my mother was right—when faced with news that felt too big ten years earlier, I hadn’t reacted well to Bexley. I owed it to the both of us to have this conversation, once and for all.
“I’d like that,” Bexley finally confessed, softly and still a little warily.
But her acceptance felt like a jolt of electricity pummeling into my chest. I stood up straight, my eyes dancing around the empty room.
“Yeah? When do you want me there?” I asked, sounding a little too hopeful.
“Whenever. We’re here, and we aren’t going anywhere.”
I smiled. “Okay, see you soon.”
* * *
I parked then slowly exited,wishing I could kick my own ass for forgetting my hat. Instead, I adjusted my hair to the left, just a bit, and grabbed what I’d picked up at the store. Internally, I reminded myself that it wasn’t a big deal that I’d picked anything up. It didn’t mean anything.
Heading up the walkway, I cleared my throat a few times in a pathetic attempt to soothe the nerves eating away at my stomach. It was still plenty bright outside as I jogged up Bexley’s porch steps, giving anyone driving or walking by a clear view of who was visiting the single mom of two.
Shit, what was I thinking?
I made a fist and rapped my knuckles against the door. Behind me, on the street, three women ran by pushing strollers. I knocked again as my heart rate spiked. This would be a PR nightmare, because it looked like I was dating the person who lived here. I was definitely not dating her, but looks are deceiving.Story of my fucking life.
“Ryan, you’re here?” Cole said, hobbling on his booted foot. He must have seen the orthopedist since the last time I saw him. Missing that felt strange; I had missed this kid’s entire life, but some strange space existed where I wanted to be included in things like seeing him get his boot or hearing all about how to take care of it. I blinked to clear away those thoughts becausewhat the fuck?
Cole’s eyes went wide as he took in the black bike leaning against my SUV.
“Is that…?” He exited the house fully, standing on the porch. The bike had dark blue zigzag designs along the frame, a headlight, a bell…the kid probably didn’t know it’d cost upwards of a thousand dollars.
“I figured you’d need a new bike once you can start riding again.” I shrugged.
It isn’t a big deal.
My eyes glanced around briefly; another set of joggers ran past the house, this time turning their heads toward us.
“Here, let’s head inside.” I ushered him back in. “You supposed to be up, walking on that?” I eyed his boot.
“Mom’s in the bathroom, shaving her legs or something girly like that, and Bella is rehearsing her song to sing to you, so there wasn’t anyone else around to let you in.” He shrugged, limping his way back to the couch.
