Page 60 of Only Once


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“I want to show you the tent at night. Just please…wait.” My fingers moved down her arm, wrapping ever so gently around her wrist. The touch was like a familiar burn I hadn’t known I missed.

“Okay.” She searched my eyes and shook her head as if to clear it.

The afternoon was spent playing Pictionary Jr and some game with trains. Bella’s drawings all seemed to look inappropriate no matter what the poor girl did, which inevitably made me laugh, a few times to the point of tears. We ate sandwiches, drank lemonade, and then decided to head back down to the lake before it got too dark.

The serene waters glimmered from the golden rays of sunshine. I hated that Cole couldn’t swim, so I carried him in the water and set him in the inflatable raft I’d purchased. He smiled as he rowed himself around the small lake. Bella started building sandcastles on the shore while wearing her hot pink life jacket. I swam close to the shallow waters, where Bexley lingered, keeping a watchful eye on her daughter.

Needing to be closer to her, I carefully moved until we were just a foot or so apart. She hadn’t dipped her head under yet, so her hair was still glossy and gorgeous from when she’d styled it earlier in the morning. Our conversation on my parents’ porch came sweeping back in, another invisible line drawn between us with my silence.

Coming up behind her, I slipped my hand around her waist and tugged her to my chest. Her small squeal encouraged me as I started swimming backward, pulling her with me. The softness of her skin slid against mine under the warm water; her jean shorts had been shucked earlier when she dipped into the water, so I could feel her everywhere.

“Ryan,” she squealed again, gripping my forearms. She wasn’t trying to pull away, so I continued with my movements, swimming us around with her back to my front, her sunshine hair in my face, against my nose, that rosebud scent filling me up.

“Swim with me, Bex,” I roughly muttered against her ear.

She turned in my arms, shocking me. We stayed like that, staring at each other, her hands resting gently on my shoulders, her legs kicking between mine. I watched as her eyes dipped to my lips. In response, I pulled her closer by gripping her hips until she was flush with me. Her sapphire eyes widened as she felt my response to being this close to her, to having her pressed up against me like this. I waited for her to push it a step further, to do something to show me she was feeling what I was feeling.

Just when I was about to let her go, she lowered her hands below the water until she was gripping my sides, her lips parting just the smallest bit. I was hardening more with every breath that passed between us, and just as I was about to do something inappropriate like slip my hand into her bikini bottom, Cole splashed us both with his little oar.

“Got ya!” He laughed, quickly rowing away from us.

We broke apart; Bexley immediately started swimming back toward the shore while I tried to play out the joke with Cole so he didn’t think we were mad at him. I playfully went after him like I was going to splash him but was careful not to. The entire time, my back burned with a glare I knew was coming from Bexley, who I was sure was going to inform me at some point that there would be no getting close again, no almost kissing or touching.

It was a fleeting moment, but I couldn’t stop thinking about what it would feel like to have it last.

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