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There were so many people who had reported on the events of that tragic day. They could never all be squelched. It was impossible, but it helped to know Daniel was trying.
I leaned against a dining chair. “Is it wrong to just want to move forward? I don’t want to pretend like it never happened—that’s not completely true. I want to remember and I want to forget at the same time.”
“What happened was tragic. But it’s done and if the public finds out your involvement, it could be very difficult on you.”
It already was difficult. I lived with this constant need to stay under the radar. This constant regret for what I’d let happen. And I wasn’t involved. I’d tried. If I’d known what was going to happen I'd have never gotten in that car, and I would’ve made sure Kyle didn’t either.
“I didn’t do enough. They were supposed to stop it. I should have.” I dropped my chin to my chest and pinched my eyes shut.
“You did the best you could. It’s always easy to look back and focus on what could have been.”
She took me in her arms and held me close.
“How do you do it? How do you have unconditional faith and support in every woman here?”
“Sometimes that’s all we need to get ourselves off the ground.” The lines around her eyes crinkled. “One day I might need yours too.”
“You already have it.” I hugged her again. “Can you help me make sure the profits from the makeup line get to the victims?”
She canted her head to the side. “Of course.”
“I don’t want to advertise that. Only the part that will go here.”
“You don’t have to donate your money here.”
“Yeah. I do.”
“Whatever you need, all you have to do is ask.” She took my hands in hers. “Paths of Purpose is a better place because of your time here.”
I blushed. “I don’t know about that. Just that you saved my life.”
Whether it was fate or pure luck that I'd ended up in Mrs. Quinn’s care, I didn't know. That was the one thing that had gone my way after everything else had failed. My own family had once and for all exiled me from their lives, but because of that, I had her. She'd accepted a stranger without question and never made me feel anything less than loved. Without her, I didn't know where I’d be.
Her expression turned soft. “Have you thought about a trip to Wyoming?”
“I’m sorry, Easy. But I can’t do it. Not even for you.”
His words had been on replay in my head. He couldn’t try. Not even for me. I shook my head. “We could have fixed things before. And I know I should go after what I want, but I need him to come after me. That’s silly, but I have to know it’s not me chasing after another guy. I need to be enough.”
“Give him a little more time.”
“I’m not going to look for a new relationship, but I’m not going to wait around either. He made his choice. It hurts. More than I want to admit. But . . .”
“You’re an incredibly strong woman.”
Coming from Mrs. Quinn, that meant a lot. Her faith in me had never ceased, and apart from Trish, she was the only person who’d ever shown that level of support. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. Holt had shown he’d believed in me when he’d offered the loft at his garage for my makeup line. But even he didn’t want to stick around to be with me. Was that what strength amounted to?
“Being strong isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.”
Chapter Forty-Five
Holt
I shoved clothes into a bag.
Then dumped them back out.
“Shit.”
