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Shit for brains.
If my dad had done any thinking, he clearly didn’t have regrets. But he had changed . . . he’d gotten worse.
Would you forgive him if he had changed for the better?
I honestly didn’t know.
Our parents had chosen drugs and crime over their children. If they’d found us and apologized a million times, I wouldn’t have believed them. There was too much broken trust between us. Maybe there’d never been any trust at all.
And those thoughts were just wishful thinking.
My parents were not good people. Eric and I took the brunt of the consequences of that. It was a simple fact I’d come to accept a long time ago.
I darted my eyes around the bars, the walls, the women.
At least it’s not dark.
That was little consolation. I shouldn’t be here. I swore I’d never be locked in anywhere again.
It’s not the closet. It’s not the closet.
This was just a bigger version of it. And just like then, I wasn’t sure I’d get out.
“Go find your brother.”
My mother’s annoyed snarl was scary.
“Where is he?” Sometimes she hid him. She didn’t like us.
She lit a cigarette and tossed the lighter on the table. “If I told you, you wouldn’t be finding him, would you, brat?”
I wadded my worn Rainbow Brite T-shirt up in my fist.She’s mean.
“Eric!” I yelled as loud as I could as I ran from the kitchen. “Eric! Where are you?”
“Shut up, you stupid little girl.”
My legs moved but I didn’t. “Owwww!” My scalp burned. “That hurts!”
She yanked harder on my ponytail. “If you’d have just done what I told you, it wouldn’t.”
“Stopppp!” I screamed as she dragged me down the hall.
“You want that retard of a brother, you’re gonna get him.”
“He’s not a retard!” I hated her. Hated. Hated. Hated.
My big brother was the best. I hope he hadn’t heard her.
She threw open the closet at the end of the hall. Eric was crouched in the back. He peered up at me, eyes blinking in the dim light.
“Get in there.”
I fell to my knees. The carpet stung as it scraped my knees raw.
Slam.
“If I hear one peep out of either of you, I’m never letting you out.”
