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“You are insinuating that I lead an idle, pointless life,” she said, stung. “It is not so. Just because I am not planning to sail the seven seas does not mean my life has no meaning.”
He smiled lazily, not responding. How infuriating he was, she thought. Why had not she thrown him out of the house? She just did not know anymore.
The butler walked into the room, carrying an enormous bouquet of flowers in a crystal vase, filled with red roses, white lilies, and delicate baby’s breath. It was spectacular.
Olivia’s eyes widened. “Oh, my! Where is the card?”
The butler handed it to her. Olivia glowed. She already knew who the bouquet was from but she wanted to milk this moment for all it was worth with Captain Fletcher here. She knew it would irritate him. She scanned the card quickly. There was no poetry written on it, nor heartfelt declaration of love. Bertie had merely scrawled his name, but the Captain did not need to know that.
“It is from Bertie,” she said triumphantly. “I knew it!”
He grunted. “Anyone can arrange flowers, if they have the money, milady. I would not bethatimpressed.”
She glowered at him. “It is a romantic gesture, Captain. Something you would have no idea about, given the fact you despise romance and love.”
“Still planning to accept the man if he proposes?” he asked, his voice highly amused, as if her whole life’s plan was a big joke.
“What do you care?” she said, in a low, angry voice. “It is none of your business at all.”
He leaned forward, staring at her intently. “Has he kissed you yet?”
Her eyes widened in horror at his audacious question. “That isdefinitelynone of your business, sir! Bertie is a gentleman.” She paused. “Unlike you.”
He grinned. “I take it that means he has not,” he said, in a dry voice. “Or if he has, it did not exactly make the earth move for you. That hardly surprises me. He is an insipid chap. Hardly the type to arouse a grand passion.”
Olivia’s face turned puce. “How dare you? You go too far, sir!”
She wanted to get up and slap him but knew she would only be playing into his hands. The worst of it was he had hit a raw nerve. Something that had been making her feel vaguely uneasy but she had been pushing to the side.
Bertie had kissed her three times now. The first time had been at Langley Park, the second in the gardens at a ball, and the third time in their own gardens. Each time she had been hoping to feel that explosion of passion that she had felt when the Captain kissed her but it had never happened.
Bertie told her constantly she was beautiful, and his eyes shone with admiration when he gazed upon her, but that regard did not seem to transfer to his lips. The kisses were dry, close lipped and rather chaste. But even more than that, she did not shiver when he held her hand. Her body had little reaction to him at all. Something which perturbed her but she had been trying to tell herself would work itself out in the fullness of time.
But what if it does not? How am I to endure such a lack of passion for the rest of my life?
All her life she had heard about her parent’s great love affair, and the passion they held for each other. Mama had never talked about that intimate side of her marriage, of course, but Olivia had seen how she felt about her father in the dreamy look she got in her eyes sometimes when she spoke about him. Mama had told her that she had been so lovesick it had sometimes been overwhelming.
“Loving someone completely feels like surrender,” her mother had said once. “It is often hard but always worth it.”
Olivia’s heart flipped. She wanted to feel that with her husband. But she was suspicious now that she might never have it with Bertie. It was infuriating, because in every other way, he was perfect. Shewantedto be head over heels in love with him, to shiver at his touch, to long for his physical presence.
Olivia bit her lip. Should she refuse Bertie and wait for another man? But time was ticking. She had set herself the goal of being engaged before the end of the season and she had almost reached the finish line. And Bertie was perfect in every other aspect. She knew they would be compatible—they shared many interests. She could learn to live without grand passion, at least, she thought she could.
“You should think carefully,” said Captain Fletcher, frowning. “This is the rest of your life. Do you really want to be stuck with him forever?”
Olivia took a deep, ragged breath. “Yes, I do. Bertie is simply wonderful. I will not listen to another word you say. You are quite impertinent.”
“I know you would rather be kissed by a man, not a boy, Olivia,” he said, in a low, husky voice. “You are a passionate woman. Living without passion in a marriage would be hell on earth. Or so I have always imagined.”
She fixed him with a furious glare. “Well, you will never find out, will you? As you are so intent upon remaining unmarried and never experiencing love. You cannot talk with any authority on the subject at all.”
“I know passion,” he said, in a flat voice. “I know when a woman wants me.” A pause. He stared straight into her eyes. “And I know when I want a woman.”
Olivia squirmed in her seat. To her horror, she was aroused by his words. Her treacherous body was doing it again. It had no connection with her mind at all where he was concerned.
Mercifully, her grandfather walked into the drawing room at that moment. He smiled with delight when he saw their visitor.
“Alexander!” he exclaimed. He turned to his granddaughter. “I do hope Olivia has been entertaining you well.”
“Very well, milord,” said the Captain, with a disarming grin. “Fine tea and a scintillating conversation.”
Olivia scowled at him. If only her grandfather knew how impertinent he really was to her. But then, Grandpapa would probably just say it was high animal spirits. Olivia knew her grandfather greatly admired the Captain. He was always saying what a fine man he was and what a great earl he would become.
But he still had not committed to Bertie. He always frowned when he was mentioned, and Olivia had seen him gazing thoughtfully at her suitor from time to time. But she was sure he would agree to the marriage when he realised how much she wanted it. Hehadpromised, after all.
She was almost there. She simply could not wait. And she was not going to let the Captain’s mean-spirited words dampen her joy at what was going to be the happiest moment of her life.
