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Harper explored the house to kill time. And she wanted to know the layout better. It amazed her to think that it was all hers. It would be fun to have Leah and Marianne over. It would be fun to raise children. And then she remembered that she probably wouldn’t have any. But she did not cry. No more of that.
With that in mind, Harper chose to ignore rooms that would be ideal for children. Anytime she poked her head into one, she jolted it back, knowing that rooms would have to hold books or spare furniture, not a bed for a child. She hoped that it would not be the first of many days where the future taunted her. Perhaps the home would just take some getting used to, and then the parts of life that she would never have, would not bother her as much.
The one part of the home that made her happy was the garden. With its great size and abundance of flowers already growing, she knew someone like her mother would just love to spend hours on end in it.
The one room that she had tried to avoid but accidentally walked into was the master bedroom. Although filled with beautiful blankets and a window that allowed the bluest sky to peer in, it sat there mocking her, just as the potential children’s room did. But unlike those rooms, her body did not flinch out. Instead, she stood in the bedroom and forced herself to hope. It was not an impossibility to share the bed with Brian one day. Nothing was impossible, she truly believed that. And holding that sentiment allowed her some hope for children as well.
When she had finished touring her new home, Harper passed through the main room and spotted a horse passing the window. It was Brian’s horse and carriage. With Brian home, her heart sped up to a rapid pace. She could not tell whether it was due to excitement or nerves. The anticipation of not knowing how Brian would treat her moving forward was growing by the second. There was a big hope that the time away from her had caused him to reflect. Maybe Brian would have reflected on the wedding, them in their childhood, and everything in between.
She heard rustling at the door and hovered by without trying to seem as though she had been waiting for Brian to come in. When he did, he gave her an awkward look.
He placed his belongings down and got settled in. The silence was rather difficult for Harper to let exist, so to break it, she said, “I wonder how long it will be before we start arguing.” She figured that if there was any way to break through a cloud of awkwardness, it was with sarcasm.
Brian put on a smile, which was a good sign for Harper, and then replied, “I am willing to start whenever you are.”
Harper was more than happy that the wedding had not stripped them of their banter. She had feared that the obligation of being a husband would change him into someone that refused to look her in the eyes and speak to her at all. But so far, he had been normal.
Brian pulled up a chair to take off his boots. One by one, he removed the laces from the slots. She was oddly interested in his movements, his fingers being so precise.
“I don’t think that I’ve seen your feet since we were children. I hope they are not hideous.”
Brian laughed and looked at her strangely. “That is the one thing that you are concerned about? I think that is a far less worrying concern than what you must look like right after waking up.”
Harper laughed so hard at it that she could barely control it. Eventually, she did and had to think of her next insult.
“I assume that I have won this round of insults, you’ve got nothing.”
“I do have something. I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”
Brian looked up from his shoes and raised an eyebrow. “My feelings are made of stone. Never hold back.”
“I was going to say that I enjoyed your last kiss, but it lacked the charm I expected of a rake.”
Brian began to blush after that. And she knew that she had won the verbal sparring. It made her feel accomplished even though she had mostly won in the past as well. It reaffirmed that she had not lost her touch.
Brian had let out a short chuckle when his face returned to its normal shade and Harper leaned up against the wall while he took off his other shoe. It was then that she realised her little quip had penetrated his stone feelings. Because he said, “Did you enjoy the kiss or no?”
Harper was surprised to hear it. It showed her that his confidence had not been bulletproof after all. Even someone like Brian had doubts about himself.
“I did not,” she lied.
Brian’s face remained unmoved. “Why do I find that hard to believe?”
Harper was playing with her hair when she said, “Because you don’t believe anything. You are a natural sceptic, are you not? The only things you believe are the things you tell yourself.”
“Are you finished?”
“Yes. I was just speaking some truth.”
They both let silence fill the room and their eyes connected for the briefest of moments. But there was a spark in that eye contact that Harper had not seen before in Brian.
“What is it? Why do you have that look in your eyes?” Harper asked.
“What look?”
“I don’t know how to explain it. But you have this look in your eye.”
“I don’t know.”
