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“When do I start the assistant work?”
“Let’s figure out your schedule and find out what works best for both of us.”
Justin and I spent about an hour looking at our schedules and arranging times. I loved listening to him and watching his lips move as he spoke. As we were wrapping up, I reminded myself that Justin was my redemption. I gave him a key to my office and told him I’d clear a table for him to use as his workspace.
“I want you to feel free to use this office as a quiet place for you to study too.” I gestured to the window. “Sitting outside while studying is difficult and full of distractions. You mentioned your home has distractions too. Please use my office. It’ll be quiet and make studying much quicker.”
Justin nodded and stared at the key in his hand.
“I will. Thank you again, Professor Grant.”
Justin left my office, and I knew the time we were about to spend together this semester would either validate my spot in Heaven or Hell.
Chapter Five
LUCAS
I’d just finished my late morning class and was heading back to my office to drop my bag off before meeting Justin in the lab. The plan was for him to go to my office after his class and find the note with instructions I’d left on his table. The instructions were for him to meet me in the lab after he had lunch. I figured while I presented my last class of the day, he could eat and take care of anything he needed to handle by the time I arrived in the lab. When I arrived in my office, I found his backpack sitting on the table where I’d left his note. He could handle instructions so far.
When I arrived in the lab, I found him standing at the opposite side of the room, reading the laminated sheet taped to the cabinet in front of him. He hadn’t noticed me yet, and as I quietly stepped into the room, I felt my heart squeeze. It was like I was looking at the back of Quincy. As if sensing my presence, he turned and smiled when he saw me.
“Hey, Professor Grant,” he greeted.
“Afternoon, Justin. Did you eat already?” I asked while walking toward the tall metal cabinet.
“No. I usually wait until I get home.”
I opened my mouth to remind him that it wasn’t healthy to wait until the evening to eat, but I quickly reminded myself there were probably reasons he did that. The main one being a financial issue, followed closely by the fact he might eat with his family. I’d wait to interject until I got to know him better.
“I’d like you to put microscopes out at each desk, clean them, then put the trays of slides at each desk. While you do that, I’m going to work on assembling the study packets.”
“Okay,” he said and immediately went to work pulling the microscopes out of the cabinet.
I stood behind the instructor’s table at the front of the room and made stacks of the different papers for the study guide for tonight’s lab. Every few moments, I glanced up to see where Justin was. He looked in my direction as he was on his way back to the cabinet. When he saw I was looking at him, he slowed his pace and smiled.
“What?” he asked, his voice dripping with shyness. He stopped walking abruptly, causing his sneakers to make a nails-on-the-chalkboard squeaking sound. Justin looked back at what he had set up so far, checking his work. “Did I mess something up?”
“No, not at all.” I stapled a packet of papers and tossed it on the pile. “I was just noticing how much you look like someone I used to know,” I lied. I certainly hadn’t just noticed. It was the first thing I’d noticed about him last semester.
“Is that a good person? I mean, is it someone you’d like to be reminded of?” Justin asked as he took another microscope out of the cabinet.
“Yes, absolutely. Quincy. He was a former lover,” I admitted to him. I kept my eyes on Justin, and when he looked up at me, his pale expression told me he was a little surprised to hear me admit to having been in love with a guy. He might have been surprised, but it didn’t seem like it bothered him either. Students nowadays were far more open and accepting than they used to be.
“That’s cool,” Justin said as he cleaned lenses. “Do you still talk to him? Are you guys friends?”
“No, but I wish we could still see one another. Even if it was just to talk.” Justin looked up at me, and it didn’t seem like he was bored with the conversation but interested in hearing it. I continued while I put the study guides together. “He was killed in a shooting back when we were in college. We were at a bar that was known to openly support and welcome students that were bi-sexual or gay. Some guy came in, started yelling about how wrong everyone there was, and then just started shooting. Eight students died that night, including Quincy.”
I looked up when I heard a tray of slides being knocked over and some spilling onto the floor. I frowned and walked around the tables toward Justin when I realized how pale he was. Flustered, he knelt and scrambled to collect the slides he’d dropped. I crouched to help, and I realized his hands were shaking and grew concerned.
“Justin?”
“Sorry, Professor Grant. I’m clumsy,” he said at the same time a failed attempt at a laugh escaped his throat. Something was wrong, or something I said severely affected him. My mind raced, searching to find what it could be. Did his blood sugar suddenly drop? Or was it something that I’d said? I reached out and put my hand on his shoulder. Over his thin t-shirt, the curve of his shoulder felt divine under my palm.
“Justin, the slides are fine. I’m more concerned about you right now—”
“I’m fine!” Justin’s tone was abrupt, and he even pushed himself out of my reach on the floor.
“What’s wrong? What just happened?”
