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“I need to get her so she doesn’t wake the other kids,” I reluctantly tell him.
He rolls to his back, pulling out of me, frustrated—in anger and sexually.
Pulling my underwear back up, I get out of bed, glancing back at Nolan before I leave. He’s lying there, tense, spread wide and glorious, not hiding anything.
“I’ll be right back,” I say with a weak smile, because I know that we won’t get back to what we just had. It’s taken a long time to get there in the first place.
I don’t know what time it is when I finally get Katy back to sleep. I yawn as I walk back into our bedroom and climb into bed. Nolan is fast asleep. Leaning over, I kiss his temple before snuggling up to his back and falling asleep.
It’s not the same as before.
Chapter Four
NOLAN
I wake to my alarm, rubbing the sleep from my eyes before stretching my body and rolling out of bed. I freeze mid-step, remembering last night. Shit. I fell asleep before she came back to bed. Letting out a frustrated sigh, I scrub my hands over my face. I’m an asshole for not staying awake for her.
Fuck, it felt so good to feel her like that again. It’d been far too long since she relaxed and let herself enjoy being touched like that. I could feel her uncoiling under my fingers as she gave in to her pleasure. I’ve always wanted my wife but feeling Stella’s desire last night was something I’ve craved for a long time.
I know she’s going to take my falling asleep personally, but that’s the furthest thing from the truth. The long hours I’ve been putting in at work are grueling and stressful, but I do it for her, for our family. I try my best to leave it all at work so when I am home, I’m present. It may not always turn out the way I hope it to, but that’s always my intention.
I know she carries our family. She’s the most incredible woman I know. She puts up with my shit, which is cause alone for her to win an award. She’s the best mother I could have ever asked for to our rambunctious kids who demand so much from her.
I felt like I’d failed her when she broke down that night and asked for time to herself. I’d move the moon for her if that’s what she needed. The fact that she didn’t feel like she could come to me and ask such a small thing made me feel like I was failing her more.
At first, I thought she wanted to leave me, and my heart instantly froze in my chest. I’m clearly not doing a good job at giving my wife what she needs. I may be able to provide monetary means for her—us—but that’s not always enough. It isn’t enough. And it was a slap in the face that I needed to wake the fuck up and give my wife more.
I finish getting ready to leave for the office but pause in the doorway from the bathroom. Leaning my hip against the door jamb, I stare at my beautiful sleeping wife in our bed. Her blonde hair fanned out on her pillow; kissable lips parted with shallow breaths. She has a leg out of the covers, her shirt pushed up just under her breasts, showing the perfect curve of her hips. My eyes trace the lines of her body, over her exposed red cotton panties and down her legs. I’m getting hard as I soak her in like this.
Pushing off the wall, I slowly walk to her and press a soft kiss to her temple before making my way downstairs to leave. If I’d had more time this morning, I’d be sinking into her, but unfortunately, I don’t. Duty calls, so off to work I go.
The entire drive to work I find myself smiling as I keep thinking about Stella. The way she kissed me last night, the way she lit up with want for me, how gorgeous she looked this morning in bed.
Visions of her are going to get me through the day. She’s my inspiration and always has been.
I always knew I was a lucky man, but this morning gave me a reminder of that luck. I need to ensure that I don’t take it for granted and lose it.
And I’m willing to put in all the extra work to make sure I don’t.
* * *
STELLA
After what I thought was going to be a turning point turned into nothing more than reality crashing down on me, I woke up to Nolan gone and a crying baby.
As the week progressed, he and I didn’t bring up what had happened—or what didn’t happen rather. Instead, we just moved forward and didn’t talk about how good it all felt, even if it was only for a few fantastic minutes.
Thursday was here now, showing that another week had gone by, and I was more anxious than ever to get my time out of the house. I kissed Katy goodbye, leaving her smiling, chubby face with my sister once more.
My ass barely hit my seat at my usual table, waiting for my order to arrive, when I heard that familiar voice at the counter behind me. I tried my best to mask my smile as I watched him order. There was an ease about him in everything that he did, with each confident step and smile, and it was fascinating to watch.
He turned, having paid for his order, and instantly our eyes met. His lips twitched, wanting to pull into a smile like the one I was holding back. He dipped his head for a second, eyes dropping to the floor, before looking back up at me, this time with a breathtakingly sexy smile on his face.
Closing the distance between us, he stood in front of me, pausing, waiting for me to make the next move. To say something. I wanted to, but I couldn’t will my mouth to speak, opening and closing with nothing coming out.
Covering his mouth with his hand, I hear him muffle a chuckle. “You think this is funny?” I ask him, crossing my arms in front of me.
“Actually, yes,” James states, looking amused.
