Page 53 of This Is Us


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Margaret raised her hand to silence Stella.

‘Well, then thank you very much, that’s so kind of you. See you in a bit.’ She turned and went down the steps to join Emily.

‘You have no idea how lucky we are to have weather like this,’ she said, picking up the rucksack by her feet and slinging it over one shoulder.

They set off down a path leading away from the castle through a small wood, which soon gave way to open land with gentle hills sweeping away to the sea. The fields were dotted with sheep and Highland cattle, their comic faces watching the women closely as they walked past.

‘Which island is that?’ Stella pointed up ahead.

‘That’s Coll.’ Emily looked towards the island in the distance, then turned to her right. ‘And over there is the Ardnamurchan Peninsula. If you ever get the chance, you must go. It’s so beautiful, like a fairy tale.’

Stella laughed. ‘I’m slightly over fairy tales.’

‘Ha, yes. Sorry.’ Emily nudged Stella. ‘Right, up here. You’ve got to see these.’

They walked just off the track and along a small path to three seemingly random stones standing up on their sides like soldiers, a circle of small boulders around them.

‘What are they?’ asked Stella.

‘Standing stones. Some kind of Stone Age meeting place, apparently. I rather like their randomness, the fact that no one really knows how long they’ve been here or even why they’re here in the first place. Not everything has an explanation.’ Emily checked her watch. ‘Perfect timing. It’s low tide about now, so the pools will be ready and waiting for us. Up here.’

Stella put her hand gently on one of the stones. It felt cool to the touch. A small shiver ran down her arm.

She turned to follow Emily and they headed back to the path and continued towards the sea, past the ruins of an old fort and down to the shore, where, just as Emily had said, a series of small natural bathing pools sat with water so clear Stella could make out the rocks and stones underneath. They picked their way down through the rough grass and Emily laid the bag down a few steps away from the edge of the water.

‘So, the trick is to not think about it for too long. Just keep walking and get in the water as quickly as you can.’ Emily was stripping off down to her swimming costume as she talked. She pointed to the bag. ‘There’s a costume in there for you. I’m getting in.’ With that, Emily turned and walked straight into the water, launching herself with a delighted yelp.

Stella riffled around in the bag and quickly stripped off behind a small rock, almost toppling over in her hurry to get the costume on. She walked to the edge of the pool, the stones pressing hard beneath her feet. She took a deep breath and started walking, one foot in front of the other until the water was up to her waist, not daring to stop in case she couldn’t start again. The sun sprinkled the surface of the sea with glittering light.

‘After three!’ shouted Emily. ‘One, two…’

Before she could get to three, Stella moved swiftly forward, swimming underwater before coming up for air in the middle of the pool.

‘Look at you! You’re like a fish!’ Emily laughed.

Stella let out a shout of glee, the energy coursing round her body. ‘It’s bloody FREEZING!’

‘I know, keep moving. Follow me.’

Stella swam on across the pool towards Emily, then spun round, treading water for a moment to take in the mountains in the distance, forests covering the gently undulating hills and the rocky outcrops on either side of her.

‘Bit further?’

Stella nodded.

She swam on beside Emily, strong strokes carrying her forward. And with a smile, Stella realised it was the first time since Simon had gone that she felt like she was swimming towards something rather than away from it. More than that, she felt alive. Present. Hopeful.

* * *

After their swim, they sat wrapped in towels on a small grassy patch just up from the shoreline, eating the bacon rolls and drinking hot, milky coffee from tin cups. The gulls argued loudly overhead and Stella and Emily watched as an otter sniffed its way through the rocks just below them, its sleek brown fur the same colour as the seaweed it was foraging through. A little further out, a second otter swam on the surface of the sea, disappearing every now and again before coming up to have another look around.

‘No wonder you hardly leave this place.’ Stella took a mouthful of her roll.

‘I know, it’s not easy to leave.’ Emily sighed. ‘But there are times when I do wonder if I’m just hiding away. Like, I know what my life holds up here. No surprises. Well, usually.’

They exchanged a look, making them laugh.

‘I am sorry for just turning up. I’m not really sure I explained my thinking.’

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