AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She laughed softly, then shook her head. “As much as I’d love to have some of your eggs and toast, I need to go. I’ve got to pick Cam up in an hour, and we need to go shoe shopping. His feet have grown another size in a month.”
I didn’t want her to go. I wanted to hold her here. But she was a mom.
I nodded. “Okay. Another time then.”
She blushed slightly, then nodded but said nothing before turning back to the door to leave. I wanted to say more. Ask her if she and Cam wanted to come watch another movie. One I wouldn’t walk out on. But I said nothing. I just let her go.
twenty-six
brielle
I tried to stay focused on shoes while Cam tried on several different pairs. The ones he really wanted were out of my budget. I’d just bought him a pair last month, but he’d had an overnight growth spurt, it seemed, and we were back, needing another pair.
My thoughts kept going back to this morning. The awkwardness. The regret in Dean’s eyes. That had been the hardest part. Going from last night to this morning had been painful. The lump in my throat had stayed in place until I saw Cam and he reminded me of all I had to be thankful for.
My phone buzzed with a text, and I glanced down at it to see Gavin’s name. Cam and I were supposed to go to a movie with him tonight.
I didn’t have the heart to cancel and disappoint Cam, but how was I supposed to look Gavin in the eye after last night? It wasn’t that we were exclusive. He’d never said we were.
We had only been dating for a few weeks. He didn’t call or text every day. It wasn’t a relationship. I had done nothing wrong … at least to him. Even though I had taken a shower, I still felt as if I smelled of Dean. Was it right to have sex all night with one man, then go out with another the next night? I didn’t know if there was an answer to that.
“Mom?” Cam said, and my gaze snapped up from the text to look at my son.
“Yes?” I asked him, smiling.
He frowned, then held up the tennis shoes in his hands. “Can I get these?”
I picked up the box to check the price, and although they were over the fifty-dollar limit by twenty bucks, I decided to give in. He wasn’t getting the two-hundred-dollar pair he wanted badly, the ones he would only look at but never ask for. He knew I couldn’t afford those, but these I could manage.
“Sure. We can get those,” I agreed, and the salesclerk took the shoes and put them back in the box.
“I’ll go pay,” I said, then followed the clerk to the counter.
My phone buzzed again, and I sighed, glancing down to see another text from Gavin. I unlocked my phone and read his text, asking if six was still a good time to pick us up tonight. Before I could overthink it anymore, I simply repliedyes, then slipped my phone back into my purse and pulled out my wallet to pay.
Once I paid, I took the bag to Cam, who was at the door, looking out at something.
“Whatcha looking at?” I asked him as I handed him the bag.
Cam swung his gaze back to me and shrugged. “Nothing. Just a guy I know from school,” he replied.
I looked over to where he had been focused and saw a boy about his age with a man who must have been his dad. He was teaching the boy to change a tire. The truck they were in had a flat. The man slapped the boy on the back, and the kid grinned up at him. It was a father-son moment.
The lump in my throat was back. Not once in Cam’s life had he ever said anything about not having a dad. Even when he had been little and his friends all had fathers, he never brought it up. But he was getting older. I had noticed that, with Gavin, Cam clung to the attention he gave him. There was no hero worship in his eyes, like there was when he spoke to Dean, but Gavin wasn’t his hero. Gavin was a man who could be a dad. Did Cam want that? Was I no longer enough? He didn’t need me as much anymore. He was growing up, and with that, he wanted more.
I knew how to change tires. I could teach him, but I knew that wasn’t what had drawn his attention. It was the father-son moment he thought he’d never have.
We walked to the car in silence. I wasn’t sure what to say or if I should let it go. Not bring it up. He hadn’t wanted me to know what he’d been watching. I knew, in his head, he was protecting me. He wanted me to believe I was enough. Right now, I just wanted to hug my little boy and stop time.
Once we were in the car, I looked over at him. “Want to go get pizza?” I asked him, knowing his favorite pizza place was right around the corner.
He cut his eyes to me. “Mom, we just bought shoes. We can’t afford pizza too. I’m good with a grilled cheese at home. Besides, isn’t Gavin taking us out tonight?”
There had been a time when he didn’t understand money, and he’d have jumped on the chance to get pizza. He wouldn’t have known that it would be a stretch for me after spending seventy dollars on shoes. Another sign he was growing up. This summer seemed to have aged him several years.
“Gavin might want to take us to get pizza,” I agreed as I turned back toward our apartment.
“Do you like Gavin?” he asked me.
