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"Willow was shattered. She'd just been humiliated, beaten simply because of one wrong look from a man she'd never met. She’d been belittled all day, tortured in the evening, and lectured by the man who helped in her creation, yet it was okay for a stranger to waltz into her life and ridicule her, beat her senseless, and potentially take her life? It was such a mind fuck, and it not only shattered her, but made us see a sense of anger I’d only ever seen in Roberto's eyes."
He lowered his gaze as he took a sip of his drink, clearly needing it for the next set of explained events that approached.
"When he left, Roberto merely looked at Willow and eventually told us to head to bed. He turned around to leave and Willow stopped him by asking if that was it." I could sense the pain in the question as Onyx fought hard to compose himself. "That's it? A stranger from nowhere, someone who wasn't in our pack, or even country, walked into his home, his territory, and was able to beat her senseless because she was a late bloomer? No, a female, late-blooming bitch who was deemed useless in his perspective. Roberto simply stated that the man was from a country where women had no right to life if men didn't allow it, and that she should have been grateful he didn't kill her."
He chuckled but the sound wasn't etched with amusement. It was eerie, a sound you'd hear when someone had decided on their target and how painful their demise would be when they were in their grasp.
"To think she should have been grateful to not have been killed for absolutely nothing. For the first time ever, Willow snapped," he revealed. "Willow has been through some fucked up shit. Situations I can never even reveal myself. I've contributed to that pain; all the pack has kind of had a role in the physical and emotional trauma that left multiple scars on her flesh, not to mention the internal ones that bled every single day. She's been chained with silver collars and shackles on her ankles and wrists, whipped and beaten to the point I wasn't sure she'd even make it..." He choked as he blinked his eyes a few times, but he fought against the urge to cry as he moved on.
"She was a force that didn't want to die. A light that flickered constantly, but she wouldn't allow her bulb to fall into the depths of the darkness. She took it all, everything that tried to confirm she was nothing but a waste of space, but it was that very interaction with a complete stranger that made her snap. She screamed at Roberto with that burned up rage, things exploding around us from the magic she clearly kept hidden from even him. The ground fucking shook, the world seemed to feel her storming rage, and at one point, I actually thought she'd kill him. She almost did, conjuring up a weapon for the first time with her magic which shocked us. She pointed the gun at him, and I thought she'd pull the trigger, but she shot his foot instead, kicked him in the side, and said she hoped he'd burn in Hell one day. Then she stormed off."
The heart of a flower who doesn't wish to be the culprit in killing the man who brought all her pain and suffering.
Her story was one we could all relate to. The pent-up anger that filled us during the years and triggered us to enact our revenge, and yet when push comes to shove, there comes that moment where you question if it was worth pulling the trigger against the very person who caused you nothing but deceitful agony.
"I panicked at the thought of her being alone. I never understood why that night felt different from the rest, but I followed her as she ran through the night. Snow rained down from the sky, the winds harsher than ever while the environment was cold as hell. I couldn't feel any of it, my mind, body, and soul just focused on getting to Willow. She ran so fucking fast. The fastest I'd ever seen her move that body of hers. When I finally got to where she was going, I was forced to stop because she was at a cliff and looked like she was about to jump," he confessed. "I wanted to scream, and yet the words suddenly got caught in my throat like the rest of my ability to speak. I couldn't comprehend what was wrong, and I'd never been so frightened in my fucking life. Just seeing her there, watching her shoulders move up and down. The sobs that cut through the whipping winds, and the glistening of her wet cheeks that were drenched with tears were agonizing. Her restlessness was both frightening and yet gave off a beauty I'd never been moved by until that heartbreaking moment. I held my breath as she readied herself to take the plunge, but minutes passed by and she couldn't do it."
He downed the rest of his drink and leaned forward to place the glass on the coffee table between us.
"No matter how shitty she must have felt, she couldn't take that final push to get rid of the pain. Death would take away the torture, constant torment, and ridicule from her community and one she should have called family. She'd be free and leave all those who deemed her useless with that unconscious mindset of guilt that thanks to their hateful words, she decided that she truly wasn't worthy of life. Yet, she couldn’t do it."
He shook his head as he muttered, "So she cried in frustration, screaming to Mother Moon and asking why the hell she was here. What possible purpose did she have to achieve for her to keep her here? What could she do for anyone else?
“She cried until tears couldn't come out anymore and then she sat on her knees for a long fucking time. I feared she'd get frostbite at some point, but she finally got up and was ready to turn around and head home. That's when shit went from calm to a fucking tornado."
I braced myself for what he was going to explain, just like the others, who were completely focused.
"As she turned around to head back, her body was pushed right back," Onyx revealed and we watched as the silver completely took over his eyes. "The foreign fucker had not only followed us, but couldn't let the idea of her living go. He pushed her with so much force her whole body was tossed into the air and soared to the middle of the frozen creek. That place was a hot spot for suicide because the waters were so fucking deep. Like there was a hidden lagoon or something at the bottom."
His hands clenched into fists as he continued.
"Her scream haunts me in my nightmares. The sight of her falling and flailing her arms and legs as if that could stop her from death. I didn't realize my scream until the culprit turned around to see me running towards the cliff to go after Willow, and all he did was laugh before he vanished, but he decided to make things worse," he explained. "When I reached the edge, something blocked me from jumping off. It was like hitting a fucking wall you couldn't see, but I watched as Willow's body crashed through the thick ice, blood already tainting the surface before she began to sink into the frigid waters. I heard the broken bones that shattered upon impact, but before all of that, there was a tiny whisper released to the world, as if she knew I'd hear it as her last words."
He stopped then as if he needed a moment for himself. I could tell it was hard for him and his wolf, the two of them fighting for control and yet supporting one another with such a vulnerable memory.
"I love you," he finally whispered as his eyes returned to black and they grew glassier by the second. "Three fucking words that seemed to slice my damn heart into pieces. No one had ever loved me. My parents surely didn’t, or I would have never been in my circumstances. Roberto was nowhere close to a loving figure, and no one else dared show me an ounce of affection, especially when I was nothing but a disgrace to them. Everyone assumed I had to be born without a heart since I didn't crave their love and attention. They didn't realize I couldn't dare allow their fake love to ruin me. To set up those expectations of hope, only to be slaughtered like my heart was at a butcher shop and ready to be served on the plates of all those who thought their lies and deceitful affection could help me find solace."
The fake love of being pressured into showing someone affection due to their circumstances. Fake love adults gave to children who had no choice but to be in their care, left to be burdens unless blessed with a family that did care.
A rarity in itself.
"She loved me. She didn't direct it at anyone else. She could feel her death approaching, and she decided in that moment that I was someone who deserved her love. After all the shit we had gone through. All the fucked-up shit I'd done to her. The stuff that hurt her...that marked her. Actions that should have made her push me so fucking far away from her heart that she'd never dare look my way. Through all of the pain, heartache, and anger we carried for one another during those fucked-up times, at the brink of death, she fucking loved me." He choked on his tears then as his eyes bled to silver, and a tear left their captivity as he muttered, "Her rapist who couldn't fight off the power that threw him into a wave of desolation that led her to be the victim beneath our very body."
What he’d said in the forest suddenly made sense.
"Willow is not one to submit to anyone. You will not treat her like a submissive wolf, let alone a weak human. You may not respect her now, and I allow you to have such an opinion, but unless she gives you permission, don’t fucking dare hurt her without consent."
"Why?" Neo asked.
"Because I already crossed that boundary and I won't dare let another man do the same to her."
Washe forced to rape her? Did he lose control...or was he controlled to destroy her because Roberto knew they loved one another?
The tension was fierce in the silent room, no one saying a damn word as it all seemed to click in.
"I fought against the invisible wall with all my might," he whispered as he stared at his hands as they opened to reveal their slight tremble. "I punched, kicked, did everything in my fucking power to break through that wall and go after her. There was a howl in the distance, one that seemed enraged with blistering anger, and yet that didn't even scare me. What frightened me to the core was losing Willow. For me to never see her, talk to her, or watch those fierce blue-green eyes in the heart of the darkness again. It took me watching her plunge to her death for me to realize how Willow had been my sole reason for living."
He lifted his gaze to stare at us, and we could see those raw emotions in his expression as he continued, "She was the reason that I fought to survive that chaos ignited by Roberto's hands every night. To endure the experiences that would have broken anyone else in a few hours. When the idea of death came into the picture, all I had to do was think of her and it would be chased away like she was fucking holy water. I knew if I lost her, that would be it. I'd die with her in my arms, just so that she wouldn't be alone in the afterlife."
