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Lost And Found On Two Spectrums: Part One
~ONYX~
"I’m not here to fucking take your place, got it? Your Willow isn’t going to get swept off her feet and kept away from your grasp like so many things that were taken from you.”
My eyes stared upwardat the ceiling, my mind repeating those same words again and again like a broken record.
In a way, it was better than dealing with my wolf’s nagging frustration as to when I was going to kill that fucker of an apparent brother, but now that he was sleeping in the depths of my subconscious, it was time for my dark thoughts to come nag me through the long hours of the night.
There were so many thoughts to digest. Their piling force made me want to run through the forest and scream my lungs out. There was too much happening, too much to decipher, and what annoyed the shit out of me was the lack of time we had to face the list of shit we needed to make right for our sanity.
For Willow’s salvation.
This next trial was going to be a difficult task - even for me. My confidence was trembling, my anxiety revolving around my capabilities was debilitating, and I was left to second-guess what I could accomplish.
This town was in the midst of Mount Marcy - a hiding place for us to take a few days to breathe and recuperate. However, I knew just like the others that we couldn’t stay here forever.
Time was ticking, our enemies were growing, and if we tried to be a bunch of cowards, all that would be left was more mayhem upon our abrupt return.
We couldn’t have anything of that sort happen upon our return to the city.
I was sure people in higher places were scrambling to take advantage of this brink of opportunity. Little did they know that, despite how things looked on the outside, none of us were fools.
Certainly, Dimitris planned for such a potential fuck-up.
I wouldn’t deny my anger that was directed at him for biting what was mine, but then again, we were all sharing Sugar at this point and she’d clearly allowed him to feed on her.
The thought of being around a triple threat hybrid like Dimitris actually frightened me when Loki casually dropped the bomb. It wasn’t the fear of losing my life or being under someone as secretly powerful as a demigod purebred descendant.
That actually didn’t faze me.
My bout of anxiety, fear, and anger revolved around Willow and what mayhem she’d be pulled into now that she was deeply connected to the Forbidden Pack.
There was no way of escaping things now. We were too far entwined, our lives woven into this group of powerful individuals. Part of me still wanted to wish this were temporary, but it was a foolish dream to continue having.
We’re far past that now.
I wouldn’t deny that being in their pack was changing me. It was breaking through the walls of ice that kept my heart encased in a fortress so I could focus on those who deserved to feel its beating warmth.
That was changing.
The ice was beginning to thaw. Each incident that forced us to work together like a true pack was chipping away at my barriers and forcing me to rely on them. To allow them to aid me the same way I was willing to aid them.
This should have been a good thing. Something I could feel proud of being a part of. A pack that wasn’t a pushover, but one that held a unique dynamic that left everyone trembling when they dared to fight against our ruling.
A dream pack.
Yet, I feared where the future would take us which was probably why Loki’s sudden arrival was fucking up my senses.
There was no way that I could ignore the reality that he was stronger than me. He was an older, wiser version of myself who probably went through some major shit that I wouldn’t even be able to endure and survive from.
What I endured with Willow was enough to push me to my limits, but allowing myself to think about the ten years he spent in that Vile Bitch’s clutches made me want to turn the city upside down and destroy that bitch and every single thing she owned above and below in our fucked-up society.
To think that all this while I had an older brother.
I’d accepted long ago that I was a lone wolf in this world. That my family didn’t want me and so I’d landed in the custody of Roberto De Luca. The only bright spot of every fucking day was Willow.
