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“Mama Jen, Mama Jen, come look. I grabbed all my stuffies and made them a home in the fort.” I hate that Kara’s mom doesn’t really care either way if she has a child or not, that would kill me to lose my children. Rage has a good relationship with three of his baby mamas, but they all don’t seem to care that he has them now.
“That looks wonderful, Kara.” I give her a smile as I shake off my bad feelings and sit down beside her, grabbing one of her toys. “We should make popcorn and put on a movie.”
“Yes!” she screams jumping up and rushing to the movie cabinet. “We have to watch the new Paw Patrol movie.”
I smile and get up, passing Rage as I go into the kitchen to make popcorn. Today, I decided to buy a popcorn machine instead of the microwaved stuff. Pulling it out, I place it on the countertop and grab the bag of kernels.
“When did I get that?” Rage asks, sounding confused.
“I bought it today.”
“Will you look at me?” he pleads, coming close.
“Just don’t, West, not right now,” I say, putting the bag of kernels on the counter. The more he talks the angrier I get.
“I need to hold you.”
“You touch me, it will be the last thing you do,” I warn him. Anger radiates off me. He cheated on me, he doesn’t get to touch me right now.
“Jennifer, I don’t know what more to do. As soon as I finished, I came straight home to tell you, that has to give me some points.”
“Yeah, it does, but it also makes me wonder if I can ever trust you. Or how often you’re going to be coming home spouting the same bullshit. I spent years of my life being ruled by men, had men I was serious about, but nothing was ever mine. I thought, finally, I had you all of you, instead you’re spreading yourself around just like every other man I know. I’ll never have someone to call my own. You just destroyed that!” I lash out at him, and angrily grab the kernels, pouring them into the popcorn machine and flipping the switch on.
Rage’s head is down, and he slinks away, leaving me on my own. There really isn’t anything he can say or do right now to make it up to me. He cheated, simple as that. I need time, I know this is my life now, but I don’t have to be happy about it or pretend to be happy about it.
I’ll never let a man take away my happiness again, and if that somehow means getting away from Rage, then so be it.
Chapter Twenty-three
Rage
Iwant to lash out, demand she talk to me, but I don’t. I’ll just have to make it up to her a different way. From now on, club parties, she’s coming. I go on runs, she’s coming. I’m going to prove to her I can be faithful. Unless I have to be at the club house, I’ll be home, with her, or shadowing her at the strip club. What I wouldn’t give to take her from that job and just have her in my house the whole time instead. But I know she’s one of those bitches that wants a life outside of the home, and I’m going to let her do that.
The minute it becomes too much, or she’s in danger, or some asshat tries it on with her, she’s done though. I’m not putting up with that shit. We might have a truce with the Jacks Devils right now, but I don’t trust those mother fuckers.
If I didn’t want to get in more shit with Jennifer, I’d go to the clubhouse, it’s what I usually do when I’m frustrated, but instead I stay home. Weston comes into the room and looks at me like he wants to curb-stomp me.
