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There was a big, Jude-shaped hole in my life now, and I didn’t know how to handle it. What I really needed was to get my head on straight about him and what I needed. Moving on was good. Healthy. It was a solid plan, if my stupid brain would get on board and help me execute it.
But my brain was a traitor. She—and I was referencing her as a separate entity at the moment—kept thinking about Jude nonstop. Possibly even more than when everything had been moving along swimmingly. It felt like everywhere I turned, I saw him and a new memory hit me.
I could barely cook meals because I would look at the chair and remember the surge of joy I felt when he pulled me closer—and then the feeling of being thrown off a cliff onto jagged rocks as he walked away.
Even when I wasn’t looking at the chair, I felt it staring at me like a ghost.
Now things were popping up at the bakery. Noticing when another customer ordered his favorite drink or wondering if he liked anything from the pickup he hadn’t made.
Turning, I shoved my face into the pillow I was lying on as if I could escape from my own embarrassment. I just needed to stay the course. That was all. It would get easier, especially if I kept not seeing him. It would get easier.
Those were the words I kept repeating in my head, hoping eventually, if I said them enough, I would believe them.
It would get easier.
It would get easier.
It would get easier.
My phone rang, breaking me out of my reverie. The device was buried in the cushions beneath me, and I flailed under the blanket trying to get it. Evie’s name was on the screen, and I sighed, swiping to answer the call. “Good timing. I was just getting lost in my own self-pity.”
“Lena?” Evie’s voice was raw with panic.
I sat straight up. “Evie? What’s going on?”
“The ranch is on fire. It’s on fire. The fire department is on the way, but everyone else is gone helping Kate and Noah. Please.”
She didn’t have to specify that she was asking me to come help. “I’ll be right there.”
I didn’t bother to change out of my sweats and T-shirt, throwing my coat and shoes on and grabbing my keys. I sent up a silent prayer Bessie wouldn’t let me down tonight. If someone got hurt or anything else bad happened because my car broke down, I couldn’t bear it.
She roared to life without any trouble, and it was almost as if she knew I needed her to be solid. Even the sound of the engine seemed stronger as I raced down the road.
Against the darkening sky, I saw the light of fire over the high walls of the ranch and blanched. Seeing fire and hearing about fire were two incredibly different things. One was almost mythical. Pictures you encountered from news stories and the internet. Seeing a place you knew with flames licking out of the windows was a horror all its own.
The gate was broken. It looked like it had been torn apart by a dinosaur or something, dented and ripped off its hinges. Smoke hung thick in the air from all different directions. Multiple buildings were on fire—at least two guest cabins, the gym, even the lodge had some smoke coming from it.
I slammed to a stop, barely shutting off the car before I was out and running toward Evie and Mara, who were carrying both buckets and fire extinguishers toward the lodge.
“What can I do?” I shouted.
Mara held out a fire extinguisher without saying anything, and I took it.
“Should I try to save the guest cabins?”
Evie shook her head while running. “No, they’re too far gone. We’ll have to wait for the fire department for them. We’re trying to save the lodge since the fire is confined to one corner. Cori and Grace are on their way. They’ll work on the gym.”
“What the hell happened?”
“It was a truck.” Mara sounded out of breath. “Big, like a construction one. They rammed through the gate then drove through and started throwing lit bottles everywhere out their windows. I was near the gate doing some last-minute work on one of the garden beds. I was lucky they didn’t see me.”
It was more words than I’d ever heard the shy woman say. But there was no time to be shocked. The cabins in front of us were going up—there was probably no possible way they could be saved.
The heat… Holy hell, I would never take firefighters for granted again. Flames licked the side of the closest building, spreading into the dead, dry grass.
I looked over and saw Evie stock-still beside us, staring at the flames in horror.
Shit.
