AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I know the timing is bad, but that’s why I thought it’d be better to do it here,” I admitted.
“Define ‘it.’”
“Talk,” I clarified, even if that was now the last thing on my mind. “I want to know what’s really going on. Before I get more involved, I—”
“You’re not getting more involved.” He straightened and dropped his arms, but he only stepped just inside the doorway. He really was worried about being close to me in his bedroom, wasn’t he?
How close is your control to snapping? I’d tested his limits last night, boldly opening my legs for him, and he’d accepted my invitation straight away.
“I want to help you.” I studied the frames on his dresser, and I knew Ryan followed my focus. I could feel the shift in energy. “Anthony’s obviously in serious trouble if you need close to a million dollars to help him. What’d he do?”
“It doesn’t matter. And honestly, the less you know, the better. Because you’re not getting any more involved than you already are. And I’m sorry you were ever pulled into this in the first place. That was my mistake.”
I tore my attention back to him, still standing rigidly just inside the door. “I’ve known Anthony nearly my whole life. He might have made some questionable life choices, but I don’t want anything happening to him.” I forced myself to stand. “You lost your father. You can’t lose your brother, too.”
Ryan closed his eyes and bowed his head. “I don’t know if Dad’s heart attack caused the car accident, or the accident caused the heart attack.” His hand at his side turned into a fist. “I guess, at this point, it doesn’t matter. I couldn’t save him. And I couldn’t save the guys I lost who I served with, either.” His tone grew deeper. Rougher. Inflicted by painful memories. My heart hurt for him, for the losses he’d suffered, and the guilt he so obviously still felt. “I’ve lost a lot of people.” He slowly parted his lids, but his gaze wasn’t on me. He was looking at one of the framed photos. “But I won’t let anything happen to Anthony, I promise.”
A promise to your father? “I know it wasn’t easy when he died. I mean, how could it be?” I wasn’t sure if this was the conversation we were supposed to be having, but it definitely felt like the one we were meant to . . . “You were nineteen, and you became the man of the house. That’s a big responsibility. Anthony was only thirteen, and—”
“And I wasn’t there for him like I should have been. Or there for Mom. So no, I wasn’t the man of anything,” he said in a low, regretful tone. Not angry at me. Just himself from the sounds of it.
“You had just joined the Navy. You couldn’t quit like a normal job.” I stood and approached him, realizing he’d been holding this guilt on his shoulders for far too long. “But you were always there for both of them whenever you physically could be,” I reminded him.
“If I’d been home to help out, maybe Anthony wouldn’t have become such a fuckup.” He tossed a hand in the air.
Will Anthony always come between us? I blew out a harsh breath, one that physically made my lungs hurt.
“He became a professional hockey player. He followed his dreams. That’s a success story, right?”
Ryan peered at me, frowning. “And what about his gambling addiction? The cheating?”
I knew Anthony loved to gamble, but had he really been addicted? I guess I never really knew him. “He is who he is, and you can’t keep taking the blame for the choices he’s made. He’s an adult. And it’s not fair to you.”
“I should’ve done better. Dad would’ve done better.” His voice cracked that time. “I don’t want to talk about this.”
I placed my hand on his chest, and he only lowered his eyes to where I touched him. “But you do want to help your brother, right?” And now I had to assume whatever trouble Anthony had found himself in had to do with gambling. He owed someone nearly a million dollars.
“Of course, and I will. I’m . . . trying to do this the civil way, at least.”
“As opposed to?” I thought back to last night. To how easily he’d taken those men down in the garage. “Ah, violence?”
His mouth tightened, and he nodded.
“And after you pay off this, um, debt for him—what then? What’s to stop him from getting in more trouble?”
“I’ll get him help. Therapy or something.” He pulled his eyes from my hand to meet my gaze. “And if he falls off the wagon, I’ll be there to catch him. Like always.”
He was as loyal as loyal could be. Maybe too loyal. Guilt prevented him from seeing the downside to continually helping Anthony jam after jam. But I knew he had to do it. He wouldn’t allow himself to fail his brother. And I couldn’t allow him to put his plans in jeopardy with the wrong fake relationship.
“Then there’s too much at stake for you to choose Calista as your girlfriend. You need someone you can trust. Someone who knows you. Really knows you,” I revealed the reason I came to his house in the first place. And here goes. “Fake date me. Not Calista.”
I swore the man’s blood drained from his face, and he went pale. “Are you out of your mind? We’re not fake dating.”
“You’re telling me the thought of us dating never crossed your mind when you pitched the request for me to be your own personal Tinder?”
“Not happening,” he gritted out, ignoring my question.
I’ll do the unthinkable, then . . . I didn’t want to go for what I hoped would be the kill shot, but he wasn’t giving me a choice. “I’ll accept the loan from you in exchange for the fake dating thing.”
