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What has he given me in return?

I should leave. Move or curse at him for the pain currently building inside my chest—for how hard breathing is—but instead, my high-heeled feet are rooted to the marble floor beneath me a few feet from him. I’m unable to do anything but lean against the large pillar and watch as he laughs at my expense. The sound feels like the cut of a sharp blade, and not one of the usual butterflies he brings present.

Always from the fringes. It’s what I’ve always done.

Since we met as teenagers and every time he’s asked something of me, I’ve been there but kept at arm's length. Unless he wants to warm my bed, and then and only then, am I given affection.

A glimpse of what could be.

At first, that was okay. We agreed that the timing was off and with his brother in jail, it was best to wait. I stood by his side through numerous attempts on his life, rough nights, and dangerous meetings—I never questioned my place with him until recently.

Our relationship should’ve been celebrated once Thiago came out, yet I’m still waiting months later.

I’ve been a constant. I’ve been a fool.

“Don’t be an ass, primo,” Mirabel chastises, lips thinning as she cuts him a glare. “But then again, men are always this stupid. You’ll be just like the rest, crying when Amberlyn walks away.”

“She’d never.” Not a single ounce of doubt, his voice hard. Almost angry at her audacity. “Her love keeps her here.”

“But I’m learning to hate you just as much.” The words leave me in a whisper, not that he can hear inside of the large ballroom where the rehearsal dinner with the entire De Leon family is taking place. Well, more party than dinner for Luna and Thiago’s big day. The wedding is tomorrow at their home. The family is full of happiness and laughter is all around me, yet I feel as though someone died.

Suddenly, sweat dots across my forehead, and the room feels too small.

Too many people.

My shame feels as though it's on full display and they all know.

Fuck, I need to get out.

“You look like you’re in need of an escape.”

There’s no need to look over; I’ve known this woman just as long as anyone else here. “I do, but I’ll be fine. This is your day and...” my head tilts and eyebrows furrow “...didn’t I watch Thiago nearly drag you out a few minutes ago?”

“He just needed a little sugar.”

“Sugar?” Voice low. It’s hard to get the words out with the huge lump in my throat.

“What can I say? I’m so sweet.” Luna snorts, her arm slipping through mine as she begins to pull me away from Ivan. Each step is painful, yet my lungs expand with a much-needed breath, and I don’t look back no matter how much my heart demands that I do.

No one stops us as we make it outside and onto a large balcony overlooking the warm South Florida waters. And even though the daytime hit a high of ninety-five, the cool seventies gracing our skin now feels suffocating.

Maybe it’s what happened. The harsh truth that’s been smacking me in the face for years and I’ve been ignoring, hoping, and praying they were false. That he did feel for me and not that I’d played a game and lost; a mere puppet to be moved as he pleased.

“Talk to us.” I’ve been so lost inside my head that I never heard Natasha follow us. I also have no idea how we ended up near the far left and sitting on a large stone bench a few feet from a set of stairs that leads to a small garden and then the beach. “What did Ivan do?”

“I’m not sure what you’re talking—”

“Cut that out, chick. You two aren't as careful as you think you are.”

“I’m pathetic.” How long have they known? A self-deprecating laugh slips before I can school my expression, and my best friends each grab a hand. It hasn’t always been this way for us; at first Luna thought Thiago cheated—another place where my feelings for Ivan made me stupid—but meeting them has been the biggest blessing. They’re the sisters I never had. “And nothing that should surprise me. I should know better by now.”

“Love makes us do and accept crazy things,” Luna says, and when I turn my head in her direction, I find the striking brunette looking out into the late evening sky. The smile on her face is one I’ve seen before and holds a tinge of anger, but it’s pushed back just as soon and replaced by understanding. “The men in this family are nothing more than stubborn idiots, I swear.”

She’s been where I am. Hurt by one of the brothers.

Yet, Thiago did what he did out of love. Out of the need, barbaric and stupid as it may have been, to protect her even if it meant pushing Luna away. His idiocy came from loyalty, while Ivan’s is fake.

Obligation: I’m nothing more than an easy lay and someone he has no choice but to put up with.

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