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Her body sags beneath mine, relieved from all its tension and I hold on to her so tight, I worry I might break her. I kiss her lips, letting my tongue slip between them as her arms cling around my neck. And when I pull back to look at her, those bright green orbs of light that I fought so hard to shut out are staring right back at me.
This woman has ripped me open, shown me I can be vulnerable, and that’s why we can never be together.
Gracie Scott is a blessing and a curse all at once. And a man like me can’t have a weakness like her.
Her nails claw at my skin as her pussy clasps around me and, for the last time, triggers me to release. My breath catches in my throat and I swear I feel my heart stop as I fill her pussy.
We stay wordless, just the sounds of our breathing and the beats of our hearts. Until I find the courage to smash down the wall of comfort we’ve built around us.
“I have to go, Gracie,” I whisper. I don’t need to tell her that what just happened was special, or that I’ve never given myself to anyone like that before. She knows, I see that from the way she’s looking back at me.
“What would you say if I asked you to stay?” Her delicate hand curls around my bicep.
“I’d tell you I don’t belong here.”
“And where do you belong, Brax?” she asks, that bratty bitch coming back to me so soon, and making me smirk despite the pain in my chest.
“Not here and not with you.” The words taste bitter as they leave my lips but the truth is rarely easy to admit.
“You told me once that making other people hurt stops you from hurting… Well I hope you’re feeling better right now, cause I’m hurting a whole lot,” she says back coldly.
I could tell her that I hurt worse now than ever, that no amount of another person’s suffering will cure the emptiness I’m gonna feel walking out of this room and leaving her behind, but I stay silent.
“You should go, Brax.” She turns her head away from me, and that gentle touch I recently acquired, up and fucks off as I clasp at her jaw and force her to look back at me.
“Don’t convince yourself you need me, Gracie, and don’t break your heart over me leaving you, because this is the nicest thing I’ve ever done for anyone in my life. Don’t take that away from me.” Tears roll from her eyes, on to my fingers. And I can’t look at her another second. I close my eyes, press my forehead into hers and breathe her in one last time.
“Goodbye, Gracie,” I whisper. My lips almost touch hers but I can’t kiss them again. It's only gonna make things harder. Pulling myself out of her takes all my strength, and I silently pull my jeans back on and leave the room, hoping with every step I take away from her that she doesn’t call me back. Her scent still lingers on my shirt as I pull it over my head, and each step I take feels like a lead weight.
“I was fine before you came here and took me.” She charges after me. “And you're right, Brax, things will be much better going back to how they were. We would never have worked.” There’s cruelty in her tone, and it gets the fucking better of me.
“Because you’re better than me, right?” I turn around and bite back at her, I should be walking away, not starting something.
“I never said that.” Gracie looks back at me, stunned.
“You never said it, but it’s what you meant.” We might as well be honest. I have my reasons for letting her go and this right here is her reason for releasing me.
“This is where I belong,” she whispers, all that confidence she chased me out here with suddenly lost.
“I ain’t gonna argue with that, princess.”
I pull on my cut and head for the stairs, but she chases after me.
“Don’t leave like this,” she begs, tugging at my arm, and I spin around so sharply I hear her gasp.
“Will you go back to him like we never happened?” I hate myself for asking her the question that’s been pounding my head for the past few weeks. “Be with him the way you just were with me?” I don’t know why I’m asking her this. I don’t wanna know the answer. The thought makes me murderous.
“You’re making it sound like it’s gonna be easy.” She looks back at me sadly.
“You said it yourself, this is where you belong.”
“And you’re telling me that if I were to come with you right now, I wouldn’t always come second to all that hate you carry inside your heart.” Her words come out harsh through the tears she’s crying, and don’t they just make me feel like a cunt.
“I guess I can’t give you what you want.” I feel my shoulders sag as I turn around and take a few more steps away from her. But I’m not satisfied. She needs to hear me out, and the selfish asshole I am wants to leave her with a wound in her soul like the one she’s carved in mine.
“Just know this,” I march back at her, grabbing under her chin and forcing her to look at me. “You can go back to him, you can pretend like we never happened. But every time he touches you…” The thought of him doing that makes my whole body tense and I smash my free hand into the wall to relieve some of that tension.
“Every time he kisses you…” I close my eyes because the thought disgusts me. I can’t even finish what I was gonna say because it makes me wanna wreak havoc.
