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I can’t see who it is because my back is against their chest, but the smell of leather and cigarette smoke gives me a good clue, and when his hand slides over my mouth to stop me from screaming, and I taste his skin on my lips, my heart rate skyrockets.
“Don’t scream,” Squealer’s low voice vibrates in my ear.
“What are you doing here?” I whisper because if this is a dream, I don't want to wake up from it. Having his hands on me again feels too good.
“I think me and you need to talk, darlin’.” Squealer spins my body around, so I’m facing him, and damn, I forgot how handsome the man is.
“Squealer—”
“No, you gotta let me get this out, Alex. I rode across two states to say it,” he interrupts, sliding a hand through his floppy hair in frustration, and suddenly seeming speechless.
“I fell in love with you,” he blurts out as if he’s mad at me for it. Trust this man to travel across two fucking states to tell me I’m to blame.
“Yeah, well, I never asked you to,” I snap back defensively.
“Yeah, and you never asked me to ride over a thousand miles out here either, but here I am.” He creases his forehead at me, looking angry, and all I want to do is kiss him. It must be the hormones.
“So why did you? Why are you even here, Squealer?” I ask. If he doesn't want to love me, surely he can get over me.
“I'm here because you drive me bat shit, crazy, insane, and you irritate the fuck out of me,” he laughs to himself, that cocky grin on his face reminding me why I fell for him so hard.
“Wow, Squealer, you sure know how to take a girl’s breath away.” I try my best not to smirk.
“You didn't let me finish,” he points out, so I gesture for him to continue.
“You do all those things, but I love you for it. You've somehow ruined every other female for me. I’m here because I don’t want a fuckin’ future unless you're in it, and I’m here ‘cause I wanna take you home.” He takes a step closer and slides his hand up to my cheek. “I really think we could make this work, darlin’,” he tells me softly.
“Really? Come on, Squealer. You’re not the settling kind.” I want to believe him, but I’m also a realist, he doesn’t know about the file my father has, and I haven't had a chance to drop the whole two baby bomb yet.
“I wasn't a lot of things before I met you. I'd never been on a date, I'd never let anyone sleep in my bed, and I sure as hell never crossed state lines to tell a bitch I was in love with her.” His eyes look into mine sincerely.
“I can't go back. My dad pulled some strings and got me a job in town. I can stay in the force here even if it is just admin work.” Squealer doesn’t realize that even if I wanted to go home with him, I can’t. Dad would bring the club crashing down, and I won’t be responsible for Maddy losing Jessie, or Ella’s kids having to visit their daddy in jail. That’s without mentioning what Rogue would do to me for having Grimm taken from her.
“Come on, Alex, you've never taken a handout from your father before, why start now? You don't want that. You don't want to be stuck in an office.” He looks so disappointed in me. I wish I could tell him the truth.
“So what do I want?” I ask him, pulling away from him and placing my hand on my hip. “You think I wanna be in your cabin? You want me waiting for you to come home when you’re done with all your club shit and have tea on the table?” I’m being a bitch because I need him to leave before Dad catches him here and all hell breaks loose. I can’t hear him tell me he loves me again because it’ll be too hard to let him go.
“No, that ain't what I want.” He scratches the back of his head awkwardly. “Look, Mads kinda had this idea about you two setting yourselves up and doing some private investigation work… I don't know. Maybe it's a stupid idea. But I liked it.” He looks shy all of a sudden, cute isn’t a word I’d ever thought I’d use to describe a man like Squealer, but that’s exactly what I’m seeing in front of me.
“You liked it?” I bite down my smile.
“Yeah,” he looks up at my mouth, “If it means me leavin’ here with you on the back of my bike, I like it a whole lot.”
“Honey, Daddy's about to do his speech,” I hear Mom call out in the distance.
“I gotta go for this.” I go to walk away, but he pulls me back so forcefully that I fall against his chest.
“You need to know how scared I was when I followed you into that warehouse. I was thinking about two people, Alex. And for once, neither of them were me.” My eyes drop to my stomach, where his focus is too.
“At the time, I didn’t want to admit it… and I know you think we’re not ready. But hell, Alex, you came into my life, and I wasn’t ready for you. But that didn’t stop me from falling in love with you. I don’t know why this happened to us, of all people,” his hand stretches out over my almost flat stomach and instantly gives me butterflies. “But I want it. I want you. I want our kid. And I ain’t gonna promise you it’ll be perfect. It’ll be hard, we’ll disagree about everything, but you give me this chance and come with me, and I’ll make sure you never regret it.”
“You’re fucking crazy.” I laugh at him, wiping away the happy tear that's crept out of my eyes. I can’t remember ever feeling this happy.
“I never claimed to be anything else.” Squealer nods his head.
“Have a baby with me, Alex. Let's do it. Let’s make it work.” The tears keep coming when I think about how much I want to say yes. But the consequences of us being together are too great. I haven't figured out what Dad will do when he finds out I’m still pregnant, or how Squealer is gonna feel about the fact we’re having two babies.
“Squealer, I wish it was that simple.”
