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Talking to Robbie came surprisingly easy. He’s interested in me. He likes me to send him photographs of my art, and it reminds me of how encouraging Danny used to be. I’ve even spoken to Robbie about my addiction, and he wasn’t put off meeting me.
I’ve told him about Alex and how good she’s been for me since she came to town, and in doing that, I opened up about Danny too.
I stare at myself in the mirror, hoping he’ll like the white dress I’ve picked out for him. This will be the first time we’ve seen each other. We haven’t even exchanged photographs. It started off as my idea, looks seem irrelevant to me these days. You can’t judge someone on how they look. I used to be beautiful. I had a figure most girls would have given anything for; now, I’m skin and bone from all the months I spent not eating properly. My hair doesn’t have the same luster it used to, and my eyes don’t sparkle. I want to be the girl I was again so much, carefree, fun-loving, sometimes I worry if I’ve lost too much of myself to ever get her back.
It’s not a long walk to the bridge where we’ve arranged to meet, and as I’m making the walk, I decide I’m gonna need to save up for a car. Now I’m not living at the club, I can’t exactly expect Tawk to still run around after me. I sit on the bench on the side of the road trying to control my nerves.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained… I read that somewhere, and that’s the mantra I stick to while I await Robbie's arrival.
A white car pulls up in front of me, and I wonder if it might be him until I realize the man who gets out of the car is far too old. Robbie is a senior at college, this man is much more my father's age.
I glance suspiciously at the man as he takes the seat beside me, wondering where I recognize him from. But he makes no attempt to acknowledge me, so to kill some time, I take out my phone and send a message to Robbie, letting him know I’m here. The sky turns a shade darker as the clouds fill heavy with rain, and I’m really starting to regret not bringing a jacket.
“You look nervous.”
I turn to face the man beside me when he speaks. The sinister smile he flashes back at me makes me feel uncomfortable.
“I need to be somewhere.” I go to stand up, but before I can move, he grips the back of my hair and pins me to the bench.
“You’re not going anywhere, sweetheart,” he whispers, just as I feel his hand engulf my mouth. The cloth he’s holding with it smells chemically sweet, and as it blocks all my airways, my vision starts to blur. I try so hard to focus on the man’s face, to recall where I’ve seen it before, but everything goes black too quickly and the cool, wet pelts of rain dripping against my skin are the only things I feel.
I wake up cold, shivering, and tied to a chair. The man in front of me smiling like some kind of fucking freak. I don’t know where we are, but the huge airy space is freezing, and the bright white lights are blinding while my eyes adjust to them.
“Nice of you to join me. I heard how much you like to be under,” the man chuckles to himself as he paces the concrete floor in front of me.
“Do you know why you're here, Abby?” he asks in a calm and collected tone. My heart is beating at a dangerous rate, and I feel the panic building in my gut as I shake my head back at him.
“You're here because you're a foolish child who bought into a fantasy.” He strokes his hand over my face. “We needed someone to give us intel on the club, and without even knowing it, you ratted them out.” I stare back at him, trying to piece everything together.
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I’m the guy you’ve been speaking to for the past few months. I’ve listened to your poor sinful heart spill out all its secrets and a few other peoples in the process.” He loosens his tie. “Persistence pays off, Abby, for some anyway. It’s a shame the same couldn’t be said for your boyfriend,” he snides cruelly.
“You bastard.” I shake my head at the man. I recognize him now, can’t believe I didn’t see it before. This is Hawker, the man who killed Danny and raped Shaniya.
“Taking his life was never part of the plan. He forced me to do that. He made a lot of stupid mistakes. The biggest of them was sending that file to his sister.”
“What does all this have to do with me?” I ask him, breaking into tears.
“You know how one mistake tends to roll into another?” I notice the gun he has in his other hand when the cool metal slides over my cheek, and I breathe calmly, trying hard not to show my fear.
The sound that escapes my mouth is a helpless one, and I know it will feed the psycho in front of me what he wants.
“I’d like to tell you that you're the important person here, Abby, but it would be a lie. You served your purpose well.” He taps the gun against my cheek.
“Why?” I manage to ask him, despite being petrified. “Why come back here?”
“The club wants me dead. Your friend Alex wants me in jail. You can understand why none of that can happen, can’t you?” He holds his face so close to mine I can smell his breath, and I spit sharply into his eye.
The fucker laughs at me as he wipes the saliva off with his fingers.
“I understand why you're angry about it, which is why I've got one last little treat for you,” he looks over at the stool beside me, and my eyes widen when I see the syringe and baggy. I can smell it in the air surrounding me, my veins pulse for it.
“No,” I shake my head in fear. I’m not strong enough for this. It hasn’t been long enough.
“Abby, I’m just trying to give you what you need. You’ve been fighting too long to be the person you feel you should be for everyone else. You told me that yourself, remember?” He strokes my cheek affectionately with his thumb.
He takes my phone from his pocket and brings it to his ear.
“What are you doing?” I ask him, starting to feel sick from the craving.
