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“Cuff me,” Squealer says, clearly not thinking straight.
“What? I can’t do that. They’ll think you did this.” I look between him and Hawker.
“That’s exactly what you're gonna tell them happened, sweetheart.” He reaches into my back pocket and swipes the cuffs that I brought with me. “Now cuff me, and pull yourself together.”
“But I did this.” I look up at him, not fully understanding.
“You did, but I ain't having a kid of mine born in no prison.”
“But, I’m not… we decided—”
“No, Alex,” he interrupts me. “You never gave me a chance to talk.”
“Squealer, you can’t take the blame for this, you’ll end up behind bars for the rest of your life.”
“Do you know what they do to police officers in prison, Alex? You gotta be sensible about this. I can handle myself. Now put those cuffs on me before they get here.” The sirens are getting louder, and my head is spinning. I want to cry for Abby. I want to hold her in my arms and hug her back to life. “You followed me here, and this is what you found when you came inside. That’s all you know, okay? You can tell them I stole the gun from your place. They’ll believe it.” He winks at me bravely.
“I can’t let you do this,” I sob, looking at Squealer like he’s crazy when he laughs at me.
“What could you possibly find funny about this situation?” I stare back at him.
“The fact you think you got a choice,” he pulls me onto his lips, inhaling me through his nose as he kisses me roughly on the mouth. Then while I’m distracted, he snaps one of the cuffs around his wrist.
“Let me do this for you and the kid?” he begs me, his blue eyes sincere as they reach into mine. “It’ll probably be the best I could do for you both anyway.” I hear footsteps approaching, and Squealer turns his back on me, placing his hands together so I can snap the other cuff over his free wrist, and I do as he says with a sting in my chest.
Stepping back, I watch a dispatch team I don’t recognize storm toward us. Hawker’s smart; we’re on the town’s border here. He would have made his call to Colorado Springs to prevent Roswell from helping us cover this up.
They scream for Squealer to drop on his knees, and I back away from him and let them take him, my mind blank and my heart empty. They treat him like dirt, pushing him down into the concrete floor, and he does nothing to fight them off, just looks up at me and nods reassuringly.
I feel an arm wrap around me, a woman I don’t recognize stroking my back as one of the other officers checks Abby for a pulse. I want Squealer to be the one comforting me, but he’s being dragged away, and as I’m led out of the building and placed into the front seat of a squad car, I watch the ambulances arrive and the trolleys get wheeled into the building.
Abby should have someone with her. She shouldn't have to travel alone, and I can’t stand the thought of her sharing the morgue with the monster that killed her.
“We’re gonna need to get a statement from you, Deputy, but we should get you checked over at the hospital first. You're in shock,” the woman tells me softly as she takes a seat beside me and drives us in the direction of the hospital.
“I’m pregnant,” I tell her, my hand stroking over my tummy as I stare at the raindrops sliding down the window. I don’t know why I feel that's relevant now. Maybe I need an explanation for what I just let happen, justification for letting Squealer do what he did.
“I’m sure your baby will be fine. You’ll be surprised how tough babies can be, especially ones who have heroes for Mamas.” She takes my hand in hers and squeezes it reassuringly.
“Come to bed.” I stand in the door frame of our cabin and look at my husband. He’s sitting on the floor with his back against the wall, steam evaporating from his naked torso into the freezing cold air.
“Go inside, Shan. It’s cold.” He keeps his stare fixed on the lake in front of him, and I ignore his words, stepping outside and sitting beside him.
It’s been a few hours since all the brothers and Rogue returned to the club. We’re still not sure what exactly happened out there, but what we do know is that Abby’s dead, and Squealer’s been arrested for killing Hawker.
When Troj found out Hawker was dead, he went straight to the gym.
He needed his space, so I gave it to him. And now I’m just relieved to have him home.
“Tell me what you're thinking.” I lay my hand over his and feel all the tension inside him. I know this must be tough on him. Getting revenge on Hawker is all he thinks about, this will be a devastating blow for him.
“Shit, I’m being so selfish. Come here.” He slides his arm around my shoulder and pulls me against his sweaty chest. And I take comfort in his arms as he kisses the top of my head.
“Troj…”
“Shhhh, don’t Shan. Let’s just sit in the silence for a while,” he begs.
I do as he requests until his breathing shallows and the heat from his body starts to cool.
