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I wondered how she could cover it so cleverly and whether it wasn't secretly eating her up inside.
"A bit ironic, don't you think?"
"You mean because I had to do what my father wanted even back then to buy my supposed freedom?"
"Supposed?" I raised an eyebrow. The plan was set – it just needed to get rolling.
"Well, who's to say you'll let me go in the end? Let me move into a house of my own?"
"Why wouldn't I do that?"
"Because there are quite a few families who know about the wedding. They will ask questions if we live separately."
"How would they even know?"
"They find out everything. And rumors persist."
"Actually, I don't care what a couple of bootlickers think. That was a promise to you, and I will keep it. Even though it might take a little longer because first, we have to convince your father that this is a real consummated marriage."
"He won't rest until he feels he has won," she said, shrugging her shoulders. "We fooled everyone in the chapel. We can do it again."
I didn't think Taddeo would be convinced by a quick kiss on closed lips, and certainly not by me carrying his daughter around in my arms. He was too smart for that. If he had completely bought the charade of an arranged marriage turned into happily married in the chapel, we would not be in this situation now.
Maybe I shouldn't have told Amedea that it was all just a game. Forcing her to the altar and making it clear that I could do whatever I wanted to her would probably have made a better impression on Santoro. But I was not at all comfortable with it.
"It has to be more convincing than what we delivered in the chapel."
She raised an eyebrow. "How long has it been since you kissed a woman? Or been on a date? It doesn't seem like you're particularly close to anyone."
I ignored the first two questions. Since Rina's death, nothing at all had happened in this direction. I'd rather watch my dick rot off than stick it in a woman who wasn'tmywife. "Maybe that's because I'm actually not close to anyone."
"Can't you put down the grouchy hermit for a few hours and pretend to be… I don't know. The old Vincenzo? The man who existed before his wife died?"
Did she even know what she was saying? What she was asking of me? I looked at her in disbelief for a few seconds. Amedea was young but not naive. She instinctively knew how to play the game with her father. But that's not why I would get involved in this game, too.
Returning to my old self was out of the question! I was no longer that man. I was not the boss. I was not the leader. I was not so full of love for a woman that I didn't even know what had happened to me anymore.
I consisted of cold anger. Grief flared up again and again and destroyed me further. I hated people and their presence. And the games within the mafia and the individual families, I had developed such a strong dislike that I preferred killing the troublemakers rather than trying to find a diplomatic solution. Of course, I did that anyway, but I also kidnapped men at night who didn't deserve to end up in prison for their deeds.
"It would only be a few hours. After that, you can kick me out the door for all I care, and I'll stay at a motel somewhere in Tramonti. I don't care. But we have to get that proof. You said so yourself."
Of course, I had said that. However, I did not expect that she would expect the same from me.
"I don't think that man is in me anymore."
Amedea contorted her face. "I think you just have to draw him out. No matter how much you change, some part of your old personality remains somewhere."
What did she actually expect from me? I would flip a switch and immediately travel years into the past? "I don't think that's a good idea," I announced and stood up.
"Why not? Are the rumors true?"
Irritated, I looked at her. "What are you talking about?"
She swallowed visibly. "Rumor has it you killed your wife back in the day."
Before my common sense could kick in, I had circled the table, grabbed her by the upper arms, yanked her off her chair, and brought her eye level with me.
Her lower lip quivered.
