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The irony is staggering. It turns out that I’m a fucking expert at lying to myself. Because I don’t want the symbol. God help me, I want the real Addie. The one who keeps herself carefully hidden. I want the woman who stole a taco off my plate when she thought I wasn’t looking. The one who inhaled a bar of chocolate before diving into a churro with unabashed glee.
She reaches behind her and pulls the zipper down her back. The dress falls to the floor in a whisper of fabric. She’s naked underneath.
I’ve seen her naked before. There’s no reason seeing her bared to me should take my breath away, but here we are. Like Theo said, none of this makes any sense.
In less than a hundred minutes, this scene will be over. In fourteen hours, I’ll be checking out of my room at Summit, and in twenty-four hours, I’ll be on a plane back to Dublin. A clock ticks in my head, counting down the seconds to the end.
Theo glances over at me, a wordless check-in. I pull myself together. Now is not the time to fall apart. We promised Addie we’d fuck her. Now is the time to deliver on that promise.
“You have the prettiest breasts, Addie.” I suck a nipple into my mouth, and her eyes flutter shut. I rub the other between my fingers, causing it to harden and swell. The sight of it sends a thrill through me. She’s so responsive. So open. She’s so fucking perfect.
“These nipples are made for clamps, don’t you think?”
She bites her lip. “Yes, Mr. Gaffney.”
The clamps I pick don’t have much of a bite. They sting, but the pain’s not unbearable. I chose them because of their looks. Small green crystals dangle from the chain connecting the clamps. I close them over her swollen nipples and cup the back of her neck. “How’s the pain?”
She turns her cheek into my palm, leaning into my touch. “It’s good. Barely a sting.”
Fuck me, she’s beautiful. I eye her with undisguised hunger. “We’re just getting started.” She’s still standing on the inside of the doorway. I beckon her forward. “Step into the room, Addie, and get on your knees.”
She obeys gracefully.
Her eyes are on the bulge of my trousers. I learned on Wednesday that Addie loves to suck cock, and no, I’m not conceited enough to think that every woman wants to deep throat my dick. I went down on Addie while she sucked Theo off, and her cunt was a river. The deeper she took Theo’s cock down her throat, the wetter and more turned on she got.
She wants my cock now; it’s obvious from the way she leans forward, her lips parted, anticipation written in every line of her body. But I don't know if it’s a good idea. I have to be careful tonight to stay clear of anything that seems like intimacy.
Intimacy would make her run. Intimacy would strip me bare.
The bedroom had been Theo’s idea. We didn’t have to offer Addie a choice of location, but he insisted. “She has to want this,” he said. He was right, but I don’t have to like it. “If she doesn’t, then so be it.”
Theo hasn’t said anything so far. I look over at him questioningly, wondering if he’s okay. If we should call it. He gestures for me to continue. Okay then.
Addie’s still kneeling in the middle of the room, waiting for her next order. Her expression is serene. She’s sinking into the sensations, leaving doubt behind. Shedding her cares, one by one, with each passing moment. This is the freedom submission offers.
If this is the last time, it needs to be everything she wants it to be.
“You’re going to take our cocks tonight, Addie,” I tell her. “Go to the cupboard. Find a butt plug and bring it over.”
She starts to get up. I clear my throat. “Did I give you permission to stand up?”
“No, Mr. Gaffney.” She bites her lip in chagrin, small white teeth indenting pink flesh. Fuck me. She’s lush and curvy and gorgeous. Naked, Addie is a fucking goddess. Her body is made for pleasure.
“You can stand up when you reach the armoire to grab what you need,” Theo says.
Is that what it’s called? Fancy prep school education.
She rummages through the cupboard and returns with a butt plug between her teeth. Her cheeks are flushed—she’s mildly embarrassed by this—but her eyes sparkle with desire, and I bet that if I swipe my fingers through her cunt, I’d find her dripping.
I take the plug from her. “No lube?” I quip. “Fine, if that’s the way you want it.” Her eyes widen. “It’s a joke,” I add hastily. “I’d never be that reckless.”
“Right, of course.” A small smile touches her lips. “I know that. You wouldn’t hurt me, neither of you.”
The trust in her voice takes my breath away. Goddamn it. I’m thirty-nine. I’ve lived enough, seen enough, to recognize how rare this is. This is special, this thing between the three of us.
She doesn’t want the same thing, remember?
Theo takes the plug from me and examines it. “Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a bad plug. But I want you tofeelit.” He walks over to the cupboard—armoire—and returns with a thicker glass plug.
