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It was only a minute later before she responded. I knew she would be waiting.
Don’t be doing emails and other work stuff when you’re in class. That’s sure to go against the rules or something.
I bit my lip, scoffing a little. She sent another email soon after.
But also, congrats, proud of you.
She always had my back, but I suppose that was her job. But I was getting to the point of finally reaching the phasing out of probation part, and I only had to meet with her twice a month. She checked in a lot more than that though, and it was nice to think she cared, that I was more than a job, more than just a case number.
Heat flooded my cheeks when I recalculated the months. Eight more months of mandated tests, check-ins, and monitoring. And the girl across the auditorium was the catalyst that started it all. Karina looked the same. Fair skin, not a freckle in sight, straight teeth that were too small for her mouth, and dark brown, almost black hair. She wore better makeup now, she finally toned down that god-awful highlighter she once used as eyeshadow.
I continued to scan the room. I recognized a few faces who had been upperclassmen at my school. I knew it was bound to happen. My hometown was only forty minutes away from this private little college, and it shouldn’t have surprised me that a fair number of students would stay so local. Staying local was a luxury or a lack of opportunity. I was the latter.
No,I scolded myself. I earned this damned scholarship. This was my opportunity, even if it started to feel like another level of high school. I double-checked my class. A four hundred level class. Then I remembered that this was one of the few classes my academic counselor had informed me I’d be jumping straight into. My high school SAT scores and GPA were average at best, but I crushed my AP English tests. Got college credits and should be able to graduate at least a semester early, maybe even a year if things worked out for me. None of that simple remedial English stuff for me, straight to the real stuff. At least I thought. This class was already feeling like another hoop to jump through, not an authentic experience.
The professor said something and a few of the students chuckled and I tried my best to focus on what he was yammering on about. I could deal with him. I could write what he wanted. I could use this as a study hall. I wasn’t so arrogant as to think I couldn’t learn something but him droning on about how hard this class would be wasn’t exactly teaching me anything.
I contemplated pulling out my phone and texting Rosalie but thought better of it. Most people could text with their iPhone to a Mac connection or whatever. I had neither of those. Not like I really needed it. Cheap worked. Cheap was good. Cheap was a game I could play with myself. How many minutes could I save each month with my track phone plan (because hell yes, I had one of those), and how much could I save with my food stamps? Most months I didn’t have to pay a penny for groceries. Such a fun little game. The cost of gas for my forty-minute commute was going to kill me though. I already had a running list of how I’d be able to swipe some cash from the grandparents if I found myself in a pinch.
I continued biting my lip and scanning the classroom; it was far more interesting than the professor or whatever emails were waiting for me in my inbox. It was an eclectic mix. Some people wore athletic clothes, some wore sweatshirts with the Clarke & Lo school emblem on them. Some wore jeans and a simple shirt as I wore. Thank God jeans would never go out of style.I’ve had this pair of Levi’s since I was twelve. They might have belonged to my mom, maybe I swiped them from a friend’s place.
Everyone had coffee sitting at their desks, and suddenly my mouth felt dry. I nearly choked on my tongue when I passed over him.Trask Davis. I hadn’t seen him in years. He sat near Karina but not next to her, which was curious considering the last time I saw either of them they had been dating.
I had to admit; he had changed. His once shaggy and boyish hair was cut and styled much closer to his head and it made that jaw of his pop. It was clear he had put on muscle, even from under his sweatshirt. His hair was brown with flecks of the summer sun streaking through it. He spun a pen between his fingers and, despite his change in appearance, I wasn’t sure why that detail stuck out to me the most. He had a nice computer open, but also a notepad and a pen. Few people used notebooks in classes, it just wasn’t convenient, but even from across the classroom, I could see the dark ink staining his hand and sleeve. I felt the sudden desire to figure out what kind of pen left those intense smudges. And before I could think about it more, students rose from their seats and began filing out of the room.
Class one of my college career was done. Check that off the list. Better a year late than never, right?
2
TRASK
Icouldn’t help but be uncomfortable in that crowded class.Ethics of Argumentwas filled with the strangest mix of people. A few students I recognized from the required classes, things like English 101 and general communication. But Junior year was where things were supposed to split. I thought I’d at least be free of any overlap with Karina. She was a psychology major for Christ’s sake, why were we still sharing classes when I was supposed to be knee-deep in my architecture classes? Shit like design theory, history of architecture, calculus, physics. I should have been in geometry or some other class that would help me.
I opened my laptop and scanned through my other classes. Physics lab and other design classes filled the rest of my day. And then the door squeaked open and in walked a little doe-eyed student I hadn’t seen before. This campus wasn’t exactly huge, the cost of the private tuition ensured that class sizes were small.She must be a freshman, but this is too advanced of a course. Must be a transfer.
“Well, I’ll be…” Karina muttered from the row in front of me. I had clearly disappointed her when the spots next to me were taken by some of my friends.
I leaned forward and whispered over her shoulder, “What? Who is it?”
She turned slightly, a blush creeping up her neck and into her face. “Eliza Walsh. I used to be friends with her, years ago. How the hell did she end up here?”
I wasn’t sure why Karina sounded so surprised, maybe it was just Karina, making everything a bigger deal than it needed to be. We dated a bit a few years ago. We broke up. Then dated again. Then broke up. Then dated again. Then broke up. She was just waiting for us to start dating again. But I’d hold firm this time. There was a reason we continued to break up, but I guess there was a reason we continued to get back together.
I pulled out my notebook and pen and caught the last bit of conversation between Eliza (and now that I got a better look, I could say I recognized her) and the professor. Hey, a simple, yet redundant class, according to Eliza. A “stay on the professor’s good side and you’ll do fine” class. That I could do. I could talk, show my charismatic side and be just fine. Of all the things I’d inherited from my father. His ability to talk and smooth over the most uncomfortable of situations was a skill I was more than happy to have in my arsenal.
I went back to sketching when the professor started his lecture again. Then people stood and filed out. I waited to pack my things, but it was clear Karina wasn’t going to leave without me. I stifled a groan and packed my bag.
“Seriously, I am just shocked that she is here. I mean, I don’t know whatreallyhappened, but it must be because she was a minor or something. I doubt they would have let her in otherwise.” Karina walked along with me, continuing her babble. “I mean, I guess we haven’t really been in contact for the better part of two years, maybe even three at this point. But things couldn’t have changed that much for her.”
“She lived with her grandparents, right?” That’s about all I could remember. “She wasn’t in my year, right?”
Karina nodded, clearly excited to finally have a non-stilted conversation after a rather awkward summer of not being together. “Yeah, she’s a year below me. But I think she took a gap year or something. But I don’t know why she’s in our class if she’s a freshman.”
Karina was a year below me. “So, how’d she end up in our class?”
Karina shrugged. “Maybe I should reconnect, see how she’s doing, figure out why she’s here. It could also be a mistake; you know how they inevitably mess up our schedules.”
I nodded. “Yeah, they scheduled two different labs for the same time, they’re still working on fixing that.”
