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“Not really,” I said, fighting the rising blush.
“You’ve been good to her,” Shayna said. It wasn’t a question, Shayna never questioned things, she simply made observations.
“She’s been good to me,” Trask said, never losing his easy smile. He grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze. “Besides, we sort of knew each other from our high school years. She wasn’t in my class but it has been nice reconnecting.”
The conversation flowed easily, and we talked about Trask’s capstone project, some of his sketches, and our shared loathing for Professor Mercer. Trask spoke with easy confidence and I had to tear my eyes away from his lips several times. Knowing that they weremylips did something to me, knowing that I could kiss them when I wanted, touch him when no one else could, did things to me. It was clear there were several eyes admiring Trask. Most notably Karina, who sidled up to Trask just as Miss Shayna said her goodbyes and left the coffee shop.
“Trask!” Karina said, placing a hand on his arm. “Glad I caught you, I wanted to talk about the auction.”
Trask stepped back, and I internally thanked him for it. “What about it?”
“Well, I think our parents are sharing a table—”
“As they do every year—”
“And I thought we could go together like we have every other year.” Karina rolled her eyes and tucked a lock of her raven hair behind her ear. “Hey Eliza,” she said, eyes still on Trask.
I suddenly felt small, like a little mouse trying to dodge an elephant’s steps. I wanted to scurry out of the way and be free of this big personality, this person with a big history with Trask.
“I have a date,” Trask said. “See you there though, maybe bring Aaron or something, he’s always fun to drink with.” Trask gripped my arm and took me through the quad and to the parking garage. He was silent the whole walk and I couldn’t form a sentence to save my life.
“About Karina—”
I cut him off. “It’s fine. Honestly, I can see the appeal of just going with her. Simpler that way.”
“I don’t have feelings for her.”
“I know,” I said, but I didn’t exactly believe it. “But with your parents not being the biggest fans and the general routine of going with her family, just go with her and make it easier on yourself.” I tried, I really tried to keep the insecurity out of my voice. What was it about Trask and Karina that made me want to simultaneously disappear and burst into flames?
“Not gonna happen.” He took a step toward me and kissed me. “I want to see you in a dress.” He kissed me again. “I want to hold your hand all night.” He kissed me again. “I want to make fun of bad art.”
“There is no such thing as bad art.”
“Oh, you’ll see.” He kissed me again. “I want to see my parents struggle to be polite and decent in front of Karina and her family.” He kissed me again. “I want to see Karina squirm in her seat with jealous rage.” He kissed me again. “But more than anything, I just want to be with you.” He kissed me again, long and slow. When his hand cupped the back of my neck, I melted.
I nodded. “Okay.”
18
TRASK
Istayed away from home as long as I could, but my mom was breathing down my neck and my dad was itching for a “sparring partner” which was just code for “I want to talk to you about your career moves but do it while we are working out so it feels casual despite me trying to ambush you.”
I called Jude on my drive over.
“What’s up, T? Everything okay?” His voice sounded slightly concerned.
“Yeah, things are fine.” I could understand his slight worry, we didn’t talk much.
“What’s up?” he asked again.
His voice made my stomach clench. I hadn’t seen him for two years and I missed him. He was once my best friend, still is, which is why I was calling. But damn if I didn’t want a hug from my big brother sometimes. “I have a question.”
“Oh no.” He scoffed. “You’re thinking, that’s dangerous.”
“Funny. Look, I just—” I didn’t know how to go about it. Jude was silent on the other end, waiting it out, letting me gather my thoughts. He was always patient like that. “It’s about a girl.”
“Nope.”
