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I was being objectified by a woman old enough to be my mother, maybe my grandmother, and I wasn’t sure how to respond.
“You got a tight tush too,” she told me with a wink.
“I...”
“So, you’re one of them new age people, your body’s a temple.” The eye roll and the sneer as she pointed to the side of the counter. “You don’t need that. Now, cash or card?”
Shaking my head as I considered her words and fighting off the general feeling of confusion, I met her inquisitive look. “Shouldn’t you want to sell me, you know, your products?”
“Son, you’re going nowhere. The food, if you want it, will be here tomorrow.” She held her hand out to me, and I gave her my card. “Now, you sit tight. I need to use Sally’s machine.” Janice walked out without a care, and I stood stupefied for several moments before my hand reached into the bag and I snuck another pancake out. I was eating it when she came back, and she rolled her eyes at me again.
I felt guilty and I straightened until I remembered I was the customer and had just paid for them.
“So Iris is up the mountain right now, but she’ll be back soon.”
Bewildered, I looked at her. “Iris? I thought you went to see Sally?”
Janice laughed as she handed me back my card. “I did, but Iris has the guesthouse, and you aren’t going anywhere until Monday at the very least.”
“You think I’ll stay here?” I asked her in surprise. I hadn’t even considered it, and as Janice moved past me to restock her shelves of my intended purchases, she gave a light laugh.
“You’re stuck here until Will comes back. Maybe Sunday, depends if he loses himself to the whisky.”
Rubbing my hand over my eyes, I tried to make sense of everything. “This is a lot to take in.” I was stranded? No, it was the twenty-first century. Pulling my phone out, I saw I still had no service. “Where’s the nearest landline?”
“You mean phone?” Janice grumbled under her breath as she gestured for me to follow. “There you go.”
Thanking her, I pulled up my brother’s details and dialled. Voicemail. Hanging up, I tried my dad. Nothing. As desperation began to set in, I phoned my friend Doug.
“Hello?”
“Jesus, you have no idea how frustrating it is for people to not answer the phone,” I said.
“Mark?”
“Yeah, sorry, yeah, it’s me.” Turning, I saw Janice making no effort to conceal the fact she was listening. “So Pierce’s car died on me.”
“Shit, really?” I heard Doug’s snort laugh, and I scratched my jaw. “I’m kind of stuck in…”
“Clearwater Pines,” Janice supplied helpfully.
“Clearwater Pines,” I repeated to Doug.
“Where the fuck is that?”
“I’m in the Rockies,” I said with a sigh.
“Why?”
“They said I would appreciate the scenic route.” The irony was not lost on me.
At all.
“He gave you the car?” Doug was sceptical. “For real?”
“Yeah, for real. I didn’t steal it; I think dad told him to be nice to me. So Peirce suggested that I drive to Denver, drop the car off, and then catch a flight back to the city.”
“When will you be clear?” Doug asked.
