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“Andi,” says Sue, “that’s rude.”
“Sorry,” I mutter. “I wasn’t being rude, I was just wondering.”
“It’s fine,” says Rebecca, smiling that big, stupid smile. “We’ve spent every free moment together. It’s been hard with him being away a lot, but whenever he’s had leave, he’s travelled back to me. He came over four months ago and proposed, and this is the first time we’ve had a chance to come here and tell you the good news.”
“April twenty-fifth?” I ask, and she nods. The day after Beckett’s funeral.
Everyone’s smile fades, and Beth rubs my arm in sympathy. “Nate told me about your brother. I’m so sorry. He found it real tough. Beckett sounded like a great guy,” Rebecca replies.
I stand and the chair scrapes back, making a screeching noise. “I should go. I’ll call later.”
“Are you coming to the dinner?” asks Sue with concern etched on her face.
I feel the tears threatening to fall and my throat tightens. “I don’t think so. Dad’s drunk, and I don’t want to leave him alone for too long,” I mutter, backing out the room. “Have a great time. And congratulations, Rebecca.” I turn and push hard out the door, breaking free into the fresh air and gasping in a lungful.
Running until my feet hurt and my eyes sting, I don’t stop until I’m staring down at the gravestone of my mum and my brother. I drop to my knees and the tears release so freely, rushing down my cheeks and dripping onto the muddy heap of dirt. I run my fingers over their etched names on the cold marble. I miss them so much, the pain threatens to rip me apart.
“I’m such an idiot,” I whisper, digging my nails into the dirt. “Why did I think he’d come home to me, and we’d live happily ever after?”
“The reunion didn’t go well then?” I look to my left where Nyx is resting against his grandpa’s headstone. Beck and his grandpa were buried on the same day, it was pure coincidence that their plots were side by side, but I took comfort in knowing Beckett had someone beside him when they knocked on those pearly gates to Heaven. Grandpa Jack sounded like a great guy. Nyx always seems to be around when I need him, and we’ve often sat here putting the world to rights. It’s nice to have someone who isn’t so involved in my life.
I turn until my bum hits the dirt and lean back against the headstone, staring straight ahead at the rows upon rows of graves. “Nope.”
“What happened?”
“He brought his girlfriend home.”
“Holy shit!” he says, almost laughing.
I turn my head to the side and roll my eyes. “Thanks.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh. It’s just unexpected. I mean, when did he get a girlfriend?”
I sigh heavily. “They’ve been talking for a year, met six months ago, and he proposed the night after he fucked me.”
“Wow, charmer.”
“I just don’t get it. He told me he liked me, that he had for years!”
“Maybe he was grief stricken?” suggests Nyx.
“No, you don’t understand. He was so into me, just like I’d always dreamed he’d be.”
“Well, did you ask him to explain himself?”
I scoff. “No way. I ran out of there like a heartbroken kitten that just got stomped on. I’m so fucking dumb. I should have known when he didn’t reply to any of my letters.”
“You deserve an explanation, Andi. Go back there and ask him what the fuck he’s playing at.”
“I can’t face it right now. Dad’s drunk again, so I need to deal with him. He’s struggling with Nate being home when Beck isn’t.”
“You can’t blame the guy. He’s watching them live happily ever after. It’s the life he should be having with his son and wife.”
“And in the meantime, I’m right under his nose.”
“Hang in there, Andi. Things will get better.
CHAPTER THREE
