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I wake up and hear arguing in the kitchen. When I make it upstairs, I am smart enough to put on pants and see I have walked into a conversation about me.
“What’s going on, guys?” My eyes bounce between them. Lad’s head is hanging, his arms crossed over his stomach. Rafe is staring at me with puckered disappointment.
Rafe pulls out the baggie of pills I didn’t know Lad had and places it on the counter. I look to Lad, but he doesn’t say anything.
“Do you have any idea what this could do to Aladden’s swimming career, for his Olympic trials? Aly, we appreciate you and have loved having you stay here. But you have to understand it proves as a complication. I’m sorry, but you are going to have to go.” Rafe’s eyes are so sad, I feel terrible for making him doubt me, lose faith in me when I have not done anything to deserve it, except protect Lad from his own consequences.
“Dad.” But Rafe cuts off his son’s attempt to smooth things over.
I am in some kind of twisted twilight zone, where bad news follows me, and I am the unluckiest person in the world.
“Addictions are hard, everyone in this room knows how badly they can be. But we have strict rules when it comes to drug use. I’m sorry, Aly. But you aren’t welcome here anymore.” Rafe shakes his head, and the face he is giving me right now makes me grateful I don’t have a father.
“They aren’t mine.” I stumble, stutter over it, my nerves are heightening, and I don’t know how to show my innocence when it hasn’t proven to be beneficial before.
“I found them in your bag, they were caught in your zipper. I went to put it back in your bag, but then I saw what it was.” Rafe’s words cut me. I blink trying to figure out why Lad would put his stash in my bag. It’s been two months since I’ve seen him go through withdrawals. I thought he was finished. He seemed good.
“Lad.” I beg him, but he isn’t budging. Tears are in my eyes. I don’t cry over much but the feelings of injustice are strangling me to forfeit.
“I think it is best if you collect your things and go, Alyeska. I can drop you off at your cousin’s on my way out of town.” Rafe offers, still trying to be the good guy.
“I’m sorry.” Because I can’t seem to produce other words, and if one of us has to go down for this crime, I know why it has to be me.
Aladden Lorenzo is meant to be somebody, have his picture hung in the hall of fame. But I overstayed my welcome, hoped for dreams that weren’t in my price range. I am only meant to be a spectator in the sport, where the athletes are trophies and the audience is left behind, tarnished gold.
By the time I make it back to Bambi’s and Julian’s, I am thoroughly defeated and exhausted with the unknown.
“Hey.” I shuffle to the front door and Bambi is waiting for me.
“Rafe called.” I bet he did after I refused a ride from him, and Lad didn’t intervene. I walked to the bus stop and waited; the time gave me a lot to think about.
I wondered if this is how the martyrs felt when they sacrificed themselves for the greater good. But at whose descriptions were they faced with when declaring this greater good?
Because I can tell you it isn’t for the person paying the price. But I guess we’ve always known we’ve been doomed since the beginning.
“Bet he did.” I drop my bag at the bottom of the stairs and run my fingers through my messy hair.
“Aly—” Bam starts, but Julian comes out of the door behind her with a garbage bag of what appears to be all my stuff.
“What is this? What’s going on?” I am on high alert.
“We’ve decided you can’t stay here any longer. Your habits are a bad influence around the kids.” Julie tosses the bag at my feet, and I think this must be a joke.
“Hey, Julie. Maybe read the room; this isn’t the time for pranks, buddy.” I fold my arms and glare at my cousin.
“He isn’t joking, Alyeska.” Bambi’s eyes are remorseful, and I can’t catch a break.
“Those pills weren’t mine! You know that I know that, Lad fucking knows that!” I can’t even begin to describe the frustration I feel right now.
“They were in your bag, Aly.” Bambi relays what Rafe told her.
I pull my head back and stand straight. I shake my head. This can’t be happening.
“You’re siding with him? Bam, you know I would never touch that shit, not after what happened to my mom.” I only look at my cousin, because she is my saving grace, my best friend through thick and thin.
“Aly, please try and understand. Julian and I are going to get married soon. We have to be on the same side. I don’t believe the pills are yours, but you have been acting strange the last few weeks and you’ve been ignoring my calls. This type of behavior…I don’t know what to believe. I am sure getting attention from Aladden made you feel seen, loved, but he got you caught up in something I can’t help you to solve.” Bambi is struggling to see the truth in her words.
“You’re getting married, same side? Where the fuck was he when you went into labor with Libby, huh? Who held your hand for twelve hours as a fourteen-year-old, and coached you through giving birth? Where the fuck was Julian when you were crying and wanted to kill yourself, because you thought it would make his life easier? Where the fuck was he?” I am shouting, and now Bambi is crying. Julian is glaring at me while hugging his soon-to-be bride.
