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“No. Go ahead and ask.”
“You sure?” He raised a brow.
“Yep. Turnabout is fair play, right?”
“Yep.” He took a deep breath then exhaled slow. “I’ve just been wondering about you. You haven’t dated anyone since Nick died, have you?”
“No.” She flinched. “It hasn’t been that long.”
“Don’t you get lonely?”
“Sometimes.” She gave a small shrug. “I don’t want to dishonor Nick’s memory.”
“Nick would’ve wanted you to be happy, Duchess. He told me so.”
“He did?”
“Yeah, that last Thanksgiving we all spent together. He pulled me aside in the kitchen and told me if anything ever happened to him, he wanted you to have a life without him, to fall in love again and be happy.”
“Really?” She blinked back the sudden sting of tears. “He was always looking out for other people. You know, he said the same thing about you.”
“What, that I look out for other people?”
“No. He knew that you enlisted to be there for him. He said that if anything happened to him, he wanted you to find your own way. Do what made you happy. Stay on as a SEAL if you wanted, but feel free to go a different way and find your own bliss.”
“Find my bliss?” Kyle scrunched his nose.
She laughed. “Okay, I might’ve paraphrased, but that’s what he meant. He wanted you to do what was right for you. He really loved you. You were his baby bro, and he adored you.”
“He always had big dreams and thought the best of people.”
“You don’t think you deserve to be happy?” she asked.
“Someday, maybe. Not sure I’m ready for that yet. How about you?”
“I don’t know,” Natalie said, honestly. “I’ve been so busy focusing on work since Nick died that I haven’t taken the time to think about it.”
“Maybe you should.”
“Maybe you should too.”
He shrugged. “I’ve spent a lot of years living out of a duffel bag. I always thought someday I’d settle down, maybe run a farm like my folks, start a family of my own. But dodging danger for a living does things to a man’s mind. I keep hoping that, once Arrieta’s caught, maybe I can put it all behind me and move on, but that’s still a big question mark.”
Natalie nodded. “Yeah, I know what you mean. I had those same dreams too—settling down, having a family. Now, I don’t know either.” She stared out the window beside her. Silence filled the car as Natalie let her thoughts drift. She wondered what the future might look like for her. After losing Nick, she thought she’d lost her chance at the home and family she’d dreamed of. But somehow, sitting next to Kyle, the dream didn’t feel totally out of reach anymore. It even felt like something she might allow herself to want again.
9
About three hours into their drive, Kyle had pulled over at a rest stop and let Natalie take the wheel. Now, he was reclined in the passenger seat, eyes closed, having hoped to catch up on a bit of the sleep he’d missed the night before. Unfortunately, the presence of a certain woman, along with the scent of her perfume and the way she kept humming to herself as she drove, had kept him awake. That and the uncomfortable ache that grew in his chest whenever he remembered the conversation they’d had earlier.
What would it be like to be the one to make those dreams of hers come true—to give her a home, a family? The thought was so tempting, it was unsettling. He’d thought all he felt for her was raw desire, but the pictures running through his head right now weren’t lustful but sweet.
Giving up, he sighed and stretched his arms above his head. “Where are we now?”
“Um.” She reached over and fiddled with the GPS, frowning and biting her lower lip in that adorable way of hers, and he stifled a moan. She really needed to stop that, or he couldn’t be held responsible for his actions. “About twenty minutes outside of Macon.”
“Really?” He raised the back of his seat, then squinted out the window. Weak sunlight filtered through the overcast sky, and ominous clouds gathered in the distance. “I would’ve thought we’d be closer to Atlanta by now.”
“Road construction. We were stuck at a dead stop for nearly half an hour a few miles back. You wouldn’t know that, though, since you were sawing logs.”
