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Shame worms its way into my chest.
Being this close to my father and thinking these things punctures my lungs. He’d be appalled. He loved us with a quiet reverence that I don’t possess. No, I like to claim things. Collect them like trophies, own them so very completely that there is no doubt in my mind that they are mine. I want to own Lauren, even if for a short while. I ache to take ownership of the look of adoration on her face. To win all her thoughts and keep them so that even when we go our separate ways, I’m a constant feature in her mind.
For once, I want to own something that no one can take away.
Even the memory of me can’t be forgotten. I won’t let her forget.
I’m going to own every part of her until I forget my own fucking name, and she has to remind me of it. I want to hear her cry my name in every decibel her throat can muster.
* * *
I drive straight home and hit my home gym, working all my frustration out. My feet race against the treadmill, sweat dripping down my face and back. My mind, though, is in the gutter, fantasising about a woman with glossy hair and a trim waist knelt on the hard marble of my hotel foyer. Gritting my teeth, I sneer at how easily she enters my mind. How easily she distracts me from ruining Royce.
The shame I felt earlier is working against my need to approach Lauren in a non-professional capacity. She doesn’t deserve my attention. Fuck, my head is a mess.
Danvers could easily draw up a new policy, allowing me the luxury of acting on my attraction, and there would be no repercussions—just the endless oblivion of no-strings sex. I hit to increase the speed and begin sprinting. My lungs scream for a break, but I grunt and fight the pain, snapping the invisible band around my chest and letting the pain-free void enter my mind.
Only then do I blank out and run until my legs are weak. I shower, dress, and call Perry. I’m in the mood to hit BANK and play gentleman to whichever woman takes my fancy.
He answers on the second ring. “Are you ready to head over to the club?” We had already discussed possibly going later.
“I can’t right now.” Of course he can. He owns the place.
“Why, where are you?”
“Some Thai place. Lauren, what is it called?” Surprise jolts through me. Whilst I’ve been sprinting her out of my mind, he’s been cosying up to her!
I catch the tail end of her voice as she mutters the restaurant’s name. I’ve never heard of it. “Why are you pushing this?” I seethe.
“It's just dinner!” Perry snaps defensively, but I cut him off and stare at my phone. I could head to BANK and continue with my evening as planned or go to the restaurant.
Mind made up, I grab my keys and leave the penthouse.
Chapter9
Lauren
Perry puts some food on my dish and then selects some rice and pops it in his mouth. “This place is amazing.”
“I know. I love it here,” I say. “I found it during my first week in London,”
“Where did you live before?” he asks, lifting his hand to gain the attention of the waiter. I watch him with a light smile on my face. He is easy company, funny, and generally a nice guy.
“Not too far away, a village just outside of Oxford.” I tuck my hair behind my ear as a waiter approaches us.
“Two more, please.” He points to our glasses.
“Spicy, huh?” I laugh.
“A little. I feel like I’ve been cheated in other restaurants after this meal.” He sniggers and blows out a stream of air. The food here makes my breath catch. Perry has got a sweat on, but I don’t want to tell him. I’m enjoying watching him try to keep up.
“Do you own any other clubs or just BANK?” I ask, picking up some chicken and dipping it into the spicy sauce.
“BANK is a new venture. I own a string of gyms,” he tells me, leaning back as the waiter places our drinks down. I know the gym at the hotel has been revamped. Maybe his and Cain’s friendship is as new as Amberley’s and mine.
“You paired with Cain to revamp the gym at CI?”
“CI?” he frowns.
