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For me.
“Thanks for having me tonight, New York,” I say quickly, tickling the strings of my guitar in readiness for the first song. “Anyone ever had their heartbroken before?”
The crowd roars again and I notice for the first time that there’s fog on the stage, swirling around my feet in shades of pink and purple.
“Well, this one is for you.”
I start singing the first few words, and I know without a doubt that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Singing in front of a live audience this size is like a drug.
I’m hooked, instantly addicted, and I want my next hit.
My voice sounds different, clearer, more in tune with the guitar than it ever has before, but if I don’t close my eyes and focus on the song I’m singing, I’ll get distracted and lose my place. With the limited timing of my set, the songs were rearranged slightly so that I can fit four of them in without going over time, and I need to concentrate on the new arrangement or I’m going to look like a complete novice.
Thankfully, the first song finishes without a hitch, and I transition seamlessly into the second song. Things are going perfectly and so far, from what I can tell, the exhilarated crowd seems to be enjoying my music immensely.
Between the second and third songs, I explain a little about the lyrics I’m about to sing, and what they mean to me. I wrote this song when I was in a dark place in my life and I want the audience to know that darkness isn’t a permanent setting. The brightness switch can be adjusted–with time and love, kindness and patience–and then I sing the entire song, hitting every single note.
I’m feeling the music inside me, and I can tell the cheering crowd is feeling it too.
The last notes play softly and I ready myself to play my final song of the set. I can’t believe it’s almost over. It went by so fast.
“So, this last song I’m going to sing for you tonight is about taking what you want from life and making it your own. I hope you enjoy it. This one is for my mom because without her I wouldn’t be the person I am today. She’s watching tonight.” I give a little wave. “Hey, Mom!”
The audience laughs as I strum the guitar, and then I start singing my heart out. I pour everything I have into this last song and give it everything I’ve got left inside me. There’s no point holding back now. I didn’t come this far only to come this far, so I dig a little deeper and find notes inside me that I didn’t even know existed.
When the bridge comes, I step closer to the edge of the stage and let the guitar fall away from my hands. The leather strap around my neck holds it in place as it swings across my stomach and I finish the song completely acapella. I’m so far off script right now it’s not even funny, and I don’t know how this is going to go down with the studio execs, but I felt it, and so I went with it.
And it might be an enormous risk I’ve just taken, but that’s what life is about.
Right?
I can hear my voice singing clearly and sweetly in the earpiece, and I can feel the warmth of the spotlight bearing down on me as I sway back and forth with nothing around me but a false air of confidence that I’m not even sure I’m pulling off.
The last words fall from my mouth, a soft cacophony of sounds that linger in the dead silence that fills the theatre like tiny pebbles tumbling over the edge of a cliff without knowing how far they have to fall.
And then there is nothing, absolutely nothing but silence as I slowly open my eyes and stand on that stage having just completely bared my soul.
I exhale softly, the spotlight dims to a soft golden hue.
And then the crowd goes absolutely insane.
Everyone is whooping and hollering and clapping so loudly it’s almost deafening. The wild eruption of sound causes tears to burn in my eyes and my chest to tighten around my heart.
I cover my mouth with both hands when the people in the front row seats all stand to their feet to applaud, and I can’t believe what I’m seeing. They loved it. They loved my songs and they obviously enjoyed the performance.
Wiping my eyes, I tell them, “Thank you for having me tonight, New York. You guys have been great, and you are in for one hell of a show. I’ve been lucky enough to spend some time with Cold Neptune, and they are going to raise the roof on this place tonight.”
The crowd erupts once more into wild chanting and cheering. There are a group of women at the very front who look like they’re about to pass out they’re so excited.
“Don’t forget to scan the QR code on your way out for links to all my social media platforms and upcoming gigs.” I take a bow and then salute the crowd. “Thanks, New York, it’s been fun.”
The house lights go off, and I take the darkness as my sign to exit the stage.
I disappear into the black curtains and walk straight into a wall of solid muscle.
Brinley
Strong arms wrap all the way around me and I inhale deeply, recognizing Reed’s signature scent that fills my senses, dragging out the euphoric high I’m riding all the way into the shore.
