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Something inside my bones reignites, hope maybe? But it disintegrates right back when it’s only Eli who comes back through the entrance. Yet again, I don’t bother trying to shield my disappointment.
I suck air down while Hailey sucks out enough of a sharp breath for the both of us. The sound is like shards of glass to my already beaten stomach.
That should’ve been Cole. He should’ve been the one to come back, but he didn’t. He took my heart and bolted.
thirty-eight
Rory
“He’sgoingtocomeback.”
I don’t bother answering Hailey because this is about the tenth time she's repeated this line. I’m not sure who she’s trying to convince more.
It’s gotten late and there’s still no sign of either of them.
The French doors are wide open, the breeze blowing the thin curtains around as my back stays to hers. She’s in my room on my bed, talking to me as if I’m in the room with her and not outside on the balcony.
After I’d realized she wasn’t planning on leaving anytime soon, I lied and told her I needed air. Really, I just wanted to be alone.
The balcony was the farthest spot I could think of to put some distance between us after she refused to let me go for a run.
After a bit of time, I did feel my muscles loosen some. Being outside has helped more than I want to admit. The coolness from the night’s air unraveling a small handful of my fractured nerves.
By small, I mean microscopic.
I’m a mess inside. Outside, I refuse to show anything. My head and my heart are feeling two very different emotions.
Eventually, Hailey gets tired of me ignoring her twenty feet away, so she decides to join me.
“Finn’s with him. He’ll talk some sense into him,” she says encouragingly.
She’s trying to be helpful. I know this, but it comes off more like an excuse, even if it wasn’t meant that way.
Cole made walking away from me look so easy. Like I was nothing to him. Not worth the fight anymore…
“You know he’s just stressed about this thing with his dad and Hardin. You guys had a fight. Every couple fights.”
I shift more of my weight toward her. “What about your parents? The divorce. Not everyone reconciles.”
She openly winces, looking ahead at nothing. Her bottom lip starts to wobble, and I feel like an asshole. It came off harsh but isn’t that life? No one ever makes it out unscathed.
The only way to survive is to learn to fix the pieces after the fall or you crumble right along with the impact.
“So, what if they are?” Her tone is bitter, accusing. “Maybe this is what they need. The time apart might help them figure things out.”
A hollow laugh escapes, I don’t mean for it to, but honestly, come on. Her mom is moving states away. That ship has already sailed. They’re done and I don’t understand how she can’t see that.
“You’re hurting right now, I know, but that doesn’t mean you get to take your misery out on the one person trying to help you.” The words roll off her tongue courageously even as she continues to shake in her spot.
Hailey’s right.
“This is real life though. Things don’t become magically fixed because we want them to. It’s never that simple.”
We don’t do simple. It’s not who we are.
“Why not?” She sniffles not hiding her angry tears, turning back my way. That hurt on her face hitting me like a smack right across my own. “Why does it have to be difficult?”
“I don’t know,” I sigh, wishing I had an answer. “Sometimes things happen. A storm shows up even on a sunny day and you’re stuck dealing with the rain.”
