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Drink.
“Hannah, did Devin explain the rules of this game?”
“Yes.”
Drink
She was going to give herself alcohol poisoning if she didn’t stop. Her words were already starting to slur.
“Stop Hannah.”
She looked down at the glass in front of me. Tossing the whiskey back I didn’t like this.
“Why?”
“You’re going to make yourself sick. I can’t lose anyone else.”
This time I didn’t bother with the glass. The bottle tilted against my lips, releasing copious amounts of liquid into my mouth.
“I get it, Hannah, you blaming yourself, what your brother did wasn’t your fault. Kelly chose to tell me to leave. Everyone leaves me. I get it. I’m not worth shit. My whole life I’ve been treated like some fragile child. The family doesn’t ever include me in anything. I thought I finally had something that was mine, that I was good at. That they couldn’t order me around while I did it. Then you came along and I thought damn I can’t be this fucking lucky. Getting to do something I loved, get paid for it,andI get the girl. The girl who is too blind to see how amazing she is.”
The bottle was on my lips again. My confession stinging my throat as it was forcefully ejected.
“Bryce.” Her voice was so faint I almost didn’t hear it.
“Let’s all be honest Hannah, it was only a matter of time before I wasn’t the shiny new toy anymore for you. Who knows if I’ll ever ride again. That’s why you were with me, wasn’t it? You told me to follow my heart. You knew I would be good at it and you could sit by and reap the benefits of being with the hot shot bull rider.”
Drink.
“You don’t really think that do you, Bryce?”Her voice caught in her throat as she spoke. I didn’t mean a word of it. I was pushing her away so it could hurt less when she inevitably walked away. If she was mad at me maybe it wouldn’t sting so much.
“If the Stetson fits Hannah.”
Her tears streaked her rosy cheeks. Her eyes begged me to say I was lying right now. I didn’t even know why I was doing it. It wasn’t like me to hurt people or push them this far away. Yet I couldn’t stop myself.
“It’s fine Hannah. You got the job you wanted. You got to stand by the hotshot bull rider and say you were his. Eight seconds is up though, isn’t it? Time to jump off before you get bucked and hurt.” Bringing the whiskey to my lips I took a hefty swig before slamming it down. “I’m over this shit. Tell the rest of them that they don’t have to worry about me anymore either. I’m done.”
The whiskey hadn’t fully hit my bloodstream yet, or maybe it had. My hand slammed into the front door of Evan's place, pushing it harder than I intended, and whacked loudly against the side of his house. Moving as quickly as my body would allow I just started walking. I knew I couldn't go back to my old place, Hannah had been staying there since she started working here.
*****
It had been two hours and the pain I felt coursing through my body from walking for so long was almost unbearable. The buzzing in my pocket had gotten annoying. I knew exactly what every text and call would result in. Me being called childish and being told I needed to apologize to Hannah. They wouldn’t be wrong. I knew what I said to her was out of line and so far from the truth.
Hannah was a sweet and caring woman. One that was much like me in that she just wanted people to see her. Not physically, but mentally. So what do I go and do? I tear her down. Tell her she was only with me for the status.
“Fucking idiot!” I yelled into the heat of the day.
I continued walking, replaying her face in my mind. I had to be at least halfway to the abandoned barn on the west side of the property. I almost wished the whiskey was taking a better hold of me.
Ahead I could make out three ATVs blocking the road. Just great.
“For future reference, silencing the phone doesn’t work.” Luke practically laughed at me as I got closer.
“How did you even find me?”
“Claire. Apparently, you shared your location for when you babysit. You done sulking?” Hunter's arms were crossed over his chest as he spoke.
“Not sulking. Taking a walk.”
