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He screwed his face up. “What?”
“I got into a fight a couple of weeks ago.” Exhaustion had me dropping my body into the nearest chair. “When I was with Romeo and we saw that crate.” I glanced at him to see if he knew what I was talking about, and with the slight tilt of his head, I continued, “I went home and Navy saw the blood all over me.” I huffed a sad laugh. “She didn’t care. Didn’t bother her that I’d confessed about my monster to her, and told her all of the things Dad had made me do.”
I heard Lorenzo move closer around the ring, his presence just what I needed in that moment. There had been so many times as teens that I’d wanted to go to him and tell him what was happening. To beg him to talk to Dad just so that I didn’t have to fight every single week. But every time I opened my mouth to tell him, nothing came out. I was bound by secrecy that my father had instilled deep within me.
“I forgot I’d put the gun in the towel drawer and…she found it last night.” I slapped my fist on my knee. “The safety wasn’t on. And she dropped it and…”
“It went off,” he finished for me. All I could do was nod, feeling like my chest was going to cave in. I hated the emptiness inside me, hated how I couldn’t just go home and wrap my arms around her. Sorry wasn’t going to work this time. But I had no idea what would. “She’ll get over it,” he murmured, grasping my shoulder. “If you explain—”
“You didn’t see her face. You didn’t hear what she said.” I rolled my head back, staring up at the dirty ceiling. “She said Dario could have been in there with her and…fuck. Fuck!”
Lorenzo didn’t say another word, he didn’t need to because he knew as well as me that I’d fucked up. It never should have happened, never should have even been a possibility. But yet again, the monster had messed everything up, and now there was nowhere I could turn, nothing I could do to explain it away.
“Come on.” He stood, staring down at me with an expression that told me to do as he said. This wasn’t my big brother now, but the boss. “Let’s go back to the mansion. Get some sleep, then talk to her. She needs space, and so do you.”
“It won’t make a difference,” I sighed, slowly standing.
“Won’t know if you don’t try, little brother.”
* * *
NAVY
I silently strapped Dario into his car seat, smiling as he cooed at me. He’d changed so much in his short nine-week life. His hair had grown and was constantly sticking up in all directions; his eyes became more and more like Dante’s each day, and his little personality was starting to shine through.
I was sure he’d smiled at me this morning as I got him ready to go out, but it could have just been trapped wind.
My shaking hands betrayed my calm demeanor as the click of his harness sounded out. We were ready to go to the doctor’s office…alone. I stepped back, staring down at Dario and his blue outfit covered in little green dinosaurs.
I hadn’t been out with him on my own yet, and today wasn’t supposed to be the first time. But I couldn’t bring myself to go into the mansion and ask someone to come with me, not when I was still so mad at Dante. He hadn’t only put me at risk with that gun left lying around, but he’d put Dario at risk too.
Taking each hit wasn’t a problem when it was me, but when it came to my baby boy, I drew the line—in permanent marker.
I was making a stand, determined to portray to Dante that I wouldn’t accept it again. If I didn’t do it now, then I was afraid I’d spend the rest of my life not being able to stand up for what was right. And maybe it was small in comparison to some of the other things that Dante did, but that didn’t affect me, not like the gun had yesterday.
Dario’s eyes slipped closed, his stomach full of milk making him sleepy. I gently closed the back door of the car, trying not to disturb him, but the click still had his arms shooting out in front of him before they slowly lowered again. He didn’t make a peep, didn’t open his eyes.
My stomach churned as I made my way around to the driver’s side. I could hear a car coming up the driveway, so I hurried, too afraid that whoever it was wouldn’t let me leave on my own. I’d taken myself to and from school no problem, but I’d been alone, not with Dario.
I turned the key in the ignition, the engine roaring to life, then headed down the driveway, seeing an SUV coming toward me. Maybe I was taking a risk by going out like this, but I just needed time away from the mansion—time away from Dante.
He’d adhered to my demand of getting out and hadn’t come home all night, but I refused to let it show that I wasn’t bothered by him not coming back. He’d done as I asked, but deep down I hadn’t wanted him to leave. I wanted him to fight. I wanted him to swear it would never happen again. I wanted…him.
I gripped the steering wheel tighter as I waited for the SUV to come past me, hating how I was contradicting myself. Romeo’s gaze met mine from behind the steering wheel, a frown on his face. He opened his mouth, even though there was no way that I could hear him, but I turned my head, not giving myself the chance to read his lips.
He pulled past me, but stopped the SUV, and I took my chance to leave, speeding down the driveway and through the open gates that had started to close.
I needed space to clear my head, and there was no way I’d get it on those grounds.
As soon as we were on our way to the doctor’s office, I relaxed. My shoulders slumped, my hands releasing the death grip on the steering wheel. I even put the radio on low to break the silence in the car. Dario slept through absolutely anything, and I was glad he did because he didn’t stir once when the gun went off yesterday. That was the only relief I’d found about the entire thing.
My breaths came a little faster, the thought of that bullet piercing my skin terrifying me. It could have turned out so differently. And all because Dante hadn’t kept his weapon safely locked away.
I hated him for it. But dammit, I still loved him. Loved him more than I ever thought I could love anybody. That was the thing though, when you loved someone, it hurt so much more when they did something to hurt you.
Every thought in my brain was occupied with Dante. I couldn’t stop thinking about him, about what had happened, no matter how much I tried. I shook my head, trying to dispel all the raging voices in my head, and focused in front of me.
The light I was waiting at turned green, the doctor’s office coming into view. I tried to pull a smile on my face, distracting myself. Today was Dario’s checkup to make sure he was okay, and to discuss vaccinations. Which was why Dante was supposed to be here with me. He’d said he didn’t want to miss a single appointment, yet he hadn’t turned up at the house when we should have left, which meant we were already running a little late.
