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Her mother touched her cheek, giving her an encouraging, yet sad, smile.
“I know it is frightening to be on the cusp of your wedding, Ellen, not knowing what to expect. However, you would be doing yourself and Simon a disservice if you were not to give him a chance. Ten years is a lot of time, and perhaps you will find that he is much changed in his manners and behaviour. You may even grow to love him, in time.”
Ellen snorted. “I do not think that will ever be possible, Mama.” She turned away, her heart again weighed down by doubts. “What of my music? I shall have to give everything up. And I do not want to!” she lamented. Tears sprang to her eyes.
“Oh, dearest. Why would he make you give up playing the piano? In my experience, most gentlemen are keen to have a wife who can play an instrument. And to have a musician as accomplished as yourself—”
“I am not speaking of merely playing, Mama, but of composing. When shall I have time to spend on my music when I have a house to run and children—” she halted, cringing at the thought of having children with Simon. “Never mind.”
Her mother stood up, straightening her skirts. “You are overcomplicating the situation, Ellen. Let us simply get through this dinner party, and then you will have a clearer understanding of the man who is about to be your husband. What gain is there in worrying?”
Ellen watched her mother head to the door. Before she went out into the hall, she turned and nodded. “Chin up, my dear. The only thing left to do is make the best of this.”
Her mother went out, closing the door softly behind her. Ellen gazed at her reflection once more. Simon may have changed much in the last ten years, but she doubted he had outgrown his tricks. It was all so unfair what her parents were forcing her to do.
But at twenty-two years old, she was fast approaching spinsterhood, and even with her independent nature, she knew she did not want the label. She stood up and went to the full-length mirror, turning this way and that. The fabric of her silvery-blue gown sparkled in the candlelight. She knew she looked her best and was sure to draw attention from every gentleman in attendance that evening.
However, it was not what she wanted. Indeed, who in their right mind would look forward to a lifeless and loveless marriage? Uttering a sigh of frustration, she smoothed down her skirts as if to take her anger out on the gown.
“Is something wrong, my lady?”
Ellen swung around, frightened by the intrusion. She placed a hand over her heart as her maid stepped out of the doorway that joined her room to that of the tiny maid’s quarters. She pinned her with a severe stare. “Ambers. How often have I told you not to sneak up on me?”
“Forgive me, my lady. I came up to lay out your nightdress for later.”
Ellen nodded. “I apologise.” She motioned for her maid to come in, and she did so, spreading the linen nightgown over the side of the bed. “I should not have been so harsh with you. It is just that I am a little nervous about this evening.”
“You have nothing to worry about, my lady. You look beautiful,” Ambers said. She beamed at her with pride.
“With much thanks to you.”
Ambers laughed. “You would look beautiful in a gunny sack, my lady.”
Ellen joined in with her laughter. “I am not so sure about that. My mother’s nerves would not recover for an entire week.” When they quieted, Ellen again turned pensive. “I shall be sorry to leave this house, Ambers. You have served me well over the years.”
Ambers’ face fell. “Surely I will be going with you when you are married, my lady?”
Ellen shrugged. “I do not know what will happen. If you are willing, I will speak to my father and Lord Grant about making the necessary arrangements for you to come along with me.”
“I would like that very much,” Ambers replied. “I would hate to leave you, my lady.”
Ellen warmed to the older woman. Indeed, she would have been sad to part ways with her as well. She had always listened and been attentive and kind to her, even though she was also from the noble class. Her family had landed on hard times, and she had been forced to take a lady’s maid position. However, Ellen had never heard her complain one time.
“You have been so good to me, Ambers. I thank you,” she said, walking over to the woman. Ambers curtsied, and Ellen took a deep breath a sighed. “Well, I suppose I should head downstairs. It is too bad I cannot hide up here all night.”
“It would be a pity for you to hide in a gown such as that, my lady.” Ambers smiled and walked around her to ensure everything was in order. “You are a vision. Now, I shall leave you if there is nothing else?”
“Of course. No, there is nothing else. Good night, Ambers.”
Her maid opened her bedroom door for her, and she walked out into the hall. Already, she could hear voices filtering up to her from the foyer, just down the hall and down the grand staircase. She took a steadying breath and made her way toward it, feeling that she was heading toward her doom.
Chapter 3
“Come along, my boy. Do not look so worried.” Simon’s father clapped him on the shoulder as they walked up to the front of the Semple mansion. He nodded, trying to look more confident than he felt. That night, he would see Ellen for the first time in ten years.
Questions assailed him and had been ever since his father announced this dinner would take place. What did Ellen look like now? She had always been a comely girl, but her beauty would hardly matter if she was still cold and arrogant.
He gulped as they walked up the steps to the front door. The last time he had seen her, she had yelled at him that she hated him—that she never wanted to see him again. He had never had the chance to tell her that he had liked her and had acted out in front of her to get her attention.
