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She only called me when she wanted to make herself feel better about being a mother. She was never one for me. I had grown to adapt to her way of being a parent, so it no longer bothered me. I never pretended to be something we were not, which is a loving family to one another.
My phone rang again, and this time, it was my father. I also ignore it, although I was a little curious why they would call me. My father and I had a better relationship. He was never the type of father to teach you how to ride a bike or build your tree houses. But he was always there when I needed him for something. Not emotionally, but in other ways.
We worked well together until I made something that was mine. And it caused a riff between us, one we’d learned to live with.
“You should talk to your parents.” Alba’s voice came from the doorway.
“Not going to happen.” Was my stiff reply.
Chapter 4
Vanessa
"Oomph!Whatisthatsmell?" I heard Leila's voice from my living room and silently groaned. I knew why she was here.
"Van!" Leila's voice rang from the living room, and my head hurt like hell, so I didn't even have the energy to tell her to get lost.
"Vanessa! Are you in there?" She yelled one more time before I heard her approaching footsteps, and then my bedroom door opened, and she peeked in.
"Oh, no." She grated out when she saw my current condition. "Vanny." She approached my bed and sat on the side, squeezing her face as she looked around the messy room.
"Did something die in here, or is that just you?"
"Go away," I mumbled, covering myself up with the blanket, my brown hair covered my eyes, but I didn't bother to shrug it off. I was too despondent to care about anything else but sleep at the moment.
"You know I can't do that, honey." I heard Leila say from underneath the thick blanket. Then she forced the cloth out of my hand and onto my face.
I looked up at her, and there is so much compassion on her face that I wanted to burst into another fit of sobs. I had cried so much that I never thought it was possible, but I was tired of crying.
It didn't mean I stopped, though.
I could only imagine how I looked as my friend watchfully gazed at me. She looked like she wanted to cry, and I could not blame her.
I had become a shadow of my former self, and you only had to know how I used to be two years ago, to understand how low I had gone.
"Don't look at me like that," I said to her, trying to hold back my sob.
"You know I hate seeing you like this. I could never understand your pain, but it hurts me to see you like this, Van. What can I do?"
"Well, for one, I'd appreciate it if you brought back my mother, then magically get me my job back, of course," I say, but the joke fell flat.
I remember when she used to laugh at my jokes. I was the funniest of the two of us. Now I don't even think I remember how to laugh. I was afraid that I would always feel like this.
Dead on the inside and incapable of finding happiness.
"Babe. You can't stay in bed forever and eat just pizza." She said, referring to the boxes of pizza scattered around my room. I was sure there would be rats or roaches all over the room by now, given its current state.
Leila helped me to sit up, and I just stared at her. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a loose-fitting top, and looked gorgeous. Blonde hair and bright blue eyes, she was the prettier one of the both of us, and our friendship dated way back since high school.
We'd been thick as thieves through high school and then college at NYU. It was almost ten years now, and she felt more like a family than a friend. That meant that she was the last remaining family I had.
My father died a long time ago when I was only two. My mom told me a hit-and-run had run him over. Ever since then, it had just been my mom and me. She had been my best friend and my pillar of support. Working as an administrative assistant, she'd single-handedly put me through college, although my dad's life insurance had covered most of it. I don't think I would have been able to get through nursing school without my mom's support.
And now she was gone. I felt like I was floating in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, with no life jacket or help in sight.
The chilling realization that I was all alone in the world made my situation even more depressing, thanks to my jerk of a boyfriend who'd gone and fallen in love with somebody else.
I remembered when Nate and I had talked about marriage. I was so excited, and she was the one I called first. She always wanted to know every single nuance of my life and in high school. I found it invasive and annoying, but the more I grew up, I came to value her active involvement in my life.
