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Skylar blew out a breath as she wound down. She straightened, wiping at her cheeks. “Well, hell, you wouldn’t even take any of my money. I figured it was because, I don’t know, you were really mad or something.”
“I’ve never had those types of feelings.” Jami smiled at her sister. “I think you’re the best thing ever.”
Skylar’s smile shimmered. “Thanks.”
Her rock star sister really was beautiful. Jami had felt nothing but awe for her as far back as she remembered. Her sister had grabbed life by both hands, even before the accident had cemented for both of them just how precious life was. Their mother’s death had hit Skylar hard for the first few months afterward. Jami still heard some of the pain in her sister’s music.
“Ugh, I haven’t cried like that in a while. Not since the incident with—” She tensed as she broke off the words.
Jami only remembered her sister having one serious partner. “You mean the breakup with Jack?”
“Yeah, that asshole.” She shoved herself upright. “Whatever. I don’t want to talk about it. I’m better off now.”
That attitude was exactly like her sister. “You are.”
“And you’re better off for kicking fucking Drew to the curb.” Skylar lifted an eyebrow. “At least, I assume you did, since you’re here.”
“I told him no,” Jami said. She really had, for the second time. The first was at the funeral. Her fingers twisted together again as she remembered the truth about the fire. “It’s my fault.”
Skylar groaned. “What is now? That prick giving you lousy sex all these years?”
Jami closed her eyes. “Andrew set the fire that killed Dad.”
“Oh, fuck,” Skylar murmured.
“He did it for me. To set me free.” Jami’s breath shuddered in. “So I could be with him.”
“I hope you told him to fuck off and called the cops.”
Her eyes opened to stare at her sister.
“And for fuck’s sake, it’s not your fault, Jame. You did everything you could to take care of Dad, though I wish you hadn’t. Hell, I’d thank Drew for what he did if it wasn’t so fucked up and if I didn’t hate him so goddamn much.” She groaned. “Being with that obsessed asshole was the worst thing you could have done. Which is why you did it.”
“What?” Jami’s lips felt numb.
“Hell, Jame, you shit on yourself all the time. Ever since the accident.” Skylar’s eyes squeezed shut. “I tried, but I couldn’t—” Another strangled groan slipped from her mouth. Then she glared at Jami. “The accident wasn’t your fucking fault, okay!”
Jami couldn’t swallow past the lump in her throat.
“I keep telling you that, but you never listen!” Skylar’s hand shoved at Jami’s chest, pinning her to the couch. “You’re going to listen this time.”
Jami shook her head. “Skylar—”
“Don’t bother telling me you were driving. I know that. The other car was drunk and speeding down the wrong side of the highway. No one could have avoided that shit. Especially not Dad, if he’d been driving.”
The numbness wouldn’t go away. “I know. You’ve said all that before.”
Skylar shoved her against the couch harder. “Then why do you still fucking look like that?”
The words pushed at Jami’s throat. “I saw the car, Skylar. I mean, not enough to avoid it, but enough to make a decision.” She could remember her thought process about how special her sister was, and she’d swerved. She’d chosen to save Skylar. Her eyes searched her sister’s, and the words slid deeper inside. She knew she couldn’t share the truth. She’d never put that kind of guilt on her. “I chose to save myself.”
“Well, of course you fucking did!” Skylar released her. “Anyone would. So just get over it, okay?”
Jami shook her head. “I don’t think it’s that easy.”
“It’s always been for me.” Skylar pulled back with a smile. “Shit, I’m starving. Let’s order a ton of room service.”
Some of the numbness left Jami as she watched her sister. To her surprise, the pain in her stomach did feel like hunger. Pancakes with Malcolm seemed like a lifetime ago. He’d be mad at her to know that was the last time she’d eaten. Warmth filled her at the thought of him. She tried to douse it by reminding herself of his anger—no, pure, violent rage—in the alleyway. The warmth didn’t fade. “I could eat,” she admitted to Skylar, rising to make sure they ordered plenty of dessert.
