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Before we set up the crib in the baby’s room, I’d tested its sturdiness by dropping a cantaloupe into it several times. I was damn proud of how it held up. Even though Maya and Steph pointed out that not how one put a baby down. It didn’t matter. That crib was indestructible.
I leaned awkwardly against the door. I felt out of place in the nursery. But it’s not like I’d be spending much time in one. Not the way my life was going.
Thinking that, I felt hollow inside.
“How are you liking it?” I wondered. “Motherhood and all.”
“I love it,” Steph answered without hesitation. She looked down at her little girl and they both smiled. Gaby babbled a little, a nice change from the crying, and Steph cooed at her.
“Really? I mean, it looks tiring,” I said. “You have to be there for her all the time.”
“Yeah, that’s what we signed on for,” Maya pointed out. “But, let me tell you, it’s so rewarding. Every day she’s different. She’s discovered something new. It’s… I can’t really even describe it.”
“Hm…”
The three of them sat together, the picture of the perfect family.
“Why do you ask?” Maya wondered. “You usually don’t ask much about parenthood.”
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you ask if Steph and I are free to hang out and you ask about the crib you built, but you never really ask us about the real stuff,” she continued. “Is something going on, Carter?”
“Yeah, is Mr.I’m Not Father Materialsuddenly questioning his title?” Steph added.
“I… I don’t know how to answer that.” I shoved my hands into my pockets and sighed. “Is it against the rules to drink in here? I’d kill for a beer right now.”
“Go for it. Bring one for me too,” Maya said. “And if you’re heading into the kitchen, get Gaby’s bottle. It’s in the warmer.”
I nodded, popping open two beers before searching around for a baby bottle. I found it in its mini sensory deprivation tank and brought everything back to the nursery.
“Is this about the girl from the other night? The one you left with?” Steph asked.
“She was hot,” Maya supplied. “Are you seeing her or something?”
“No. Kind of.” I sipped my beer. I didn’t want to give up too much when it came to Zoe. Bragging to my friends that I’d slept with her suddenly felt like cheapening the experience.
“You like her?” Maya wondered.
I shrugged.
“You want to date her?” Steph asked.
“I don’t know,” I admitted.
“You took her home the other night.”
I nodded. “She’s my neighbor. Zoe. She’s…” I didn’t know how to describe Zoe in a way that felt like enough. She was my friend, kind of. She was sweet and cool and funny. She was the best sex I’d had in a long time. “She’s… got a kid.”
They looked at each other, then me, then down at baby Gaby. Steph stood up.
“Sit down, Carter,” she commanded.
“Huh?”
“Take a seat and put the beer down.”
Stephanie looked serious and I sat down in the wooden rocking chair.
