AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Chapter Twenty-Six
Kaja
––––––––
“KAJA, WAIT!”
Hallie’s shout came from behind me. I’d made it to the front gate and had punched the button to open them, but they’d remained shut.
I wasn’t even sure where I thought I was going to go. It wasn’t as though I had anywhere to run to. Besides, I had no reason not to stop for Hallie. We barely knew each other, but she was the closest thing I had to a friend right now. I’d envied the easy familiarity she had with Layla, the way the two of them had joked around and had fun while they’d prepared drinks in the kitchen and I stood on the outskirts, looking in. It had made me realise I’d never had a real friend before. Hell, I’d never even had a fake friend. The closest I’d ever had to having one had been my brother when I’d been small, and then he had died. There had been people who I’d got to know during my trips into the city—such as the librarian, the assistant at the local bookstore, the waitress in a café I frequented—but though I’d had conversations with them and they’d always said hello to me, I could hardly have called them friends.
I halted and turned to Hallie.
She gave me a sympathetic smile. “I understand why you’re running, but Leo doesn’t mean it.”
“Doesn’t he? It didn’t seem that way to me.”
“Leo has been all kinds of fucked up since losing Jodie. It might seem hard to believe, but he wasn’t always like this. Before Jodie, he was sweet and kind—well, as sweet and kind as any men are in this business.”
“Do you think there’s any way he can become that man again?”
“Are you asking me if you think he’ll become that way for you?”
I glanced away, my cheeks heating.
“I’ve seen how you look at him, Kaja. It’s clear there’s something between you. But don’t go hoping for the man he used to be. When a loss like that happens to a person, it changes them for good. Maybe he can shape his new self around that loss, and around you, too, but he won’t ever be able to go back.”
“He doesn’t want me. You heard him. He’d rather I was dead.”
“He doesn’t want you dead. He found himself backed into a corner, and he said that rather than contemplate letting another woman into his life. He’s probably terrified and feels guilty that he’s betraying Jodie.”
I snorted in disbelief. “He doesn’t feel that guilty when he’s fucking me.”
“Sex is sex. It’s different when there’s no emotion involved—a physical need like eating or sleeping. It’s that guilt over how he’s feeling that’s making him say those things. He’s lashing out, like a cornered animal.”
I chewed on my lower lip. “You seem to know a lot about this kind of thing.”
“Tam and I didn’t get off to the best of starts either. He swore he didn’t want me. Our marriage wasn’t exactly either of our choices. Our fathers were the ones who arranged it in order to unite our two families.”
Her words surprised me. “But you both seem so happy.”
“We are, now, but it wasn’t like that initially. Tam didn’t want to admit to himself that he felt something for me either. To be honest, I guess I was the same way as well.”
