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Suddenly, a vision of a naked Jesse danced in my head, and I couldn’t stop myself from wondering if the fantasy of that would be just as good as the reality. Not, of course, that I’d ever experience that in real life.
Frustration moved through me for all the wrong reasons. “No, Jesse, I don’t sleep naked.”
He made a face of mock disappointment before he replied, “Then, there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Uh, there’s plenty to be concerned about,” I informed him.
Jesse took a few steps closer, and the look in his eyes had me pinned to the spot. I couldn’t move. When his body was only inches in front of mine, he said, “I promise I won’t sleep naked unless you ask me to.”
A shiver ran down my spine. Why would he say something like that? “Why would you say something like that?”
“Because that’s the only thing I could imagine you being concerned about,” he replied. “You said you don’t sleep naked. I’m promising you I won’t, and since you don’t have a boyfriend, there’s really nothing that should be an issue here.”
I couldn’t work out if he was trying to make me feel bad about the fact that I didn’t have a boyfriend. It seemed unnecessary to rub something like that in my face.
“Well, what about you?” I questioned him.
“What about me?”
“You’re standing here bringing up the fact that I don’t have boyfriend,” I reminded him. “What about you? Do you have a girlfriend?”
He shot me a questioning look as he tipped his head to the side. “Do you honestly think I’d have taken you out to dinner tonight and then offered to have you sleep in my bed if I did?”
I lifted my shoulders toward my ears. “I don’t know. I’m not sure I know you well enough to draw that conclusion.”
Hurt moved through his expression, but as quickly as I saw it, it was gone. I hadn’t intended to wound him emotionally or anything like that, but this was a lot. So much was happening, and it was coming at me so fast. I was panicking, just a touch.
“There is no girlfriend, Sawyer.”
I looked away as I replied quietly, “Right.”
The tension was thick between us. I felt like I was suffocating with the weight of it. Jesse either wasn’t as affected by it, or he just knew how to move on from it better than I did, because a moment later, he said, “You can use the master to take a shower. I’m going to head downstairs for a minute to take care of a few things, and I’ll hop in the other one when I come back up.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
“It’s no problem.”
With that, Jesse turned and walked away. I watched him go and had to admit that I loved everything about the way he looked from behind.
After giving myself a minute to appreciate that view of him, I snapped out of it and dashed into the bathroom.
While I didn’t want to be rude and use all the hot water, I did spend a little longer in the shower than would have been typical for me. I did that because it seemed the bathroom would be the only place I might get a reprieve from Jesse.
The thing was, a very big part of me didn’t want the break from him. All the hopes and dreams I’d had when I was a teenager about the kind of relationship I wanted with Jesse were, in so many ways, becoming a reality now. But deep down, I knew this was all on the surface.
Jesse might have made it clear that he didn’t want to let me out of his sight, but the reason for that was about the work that he did. He was only inviting me to sleep in his bed because this was a precarious situation.
Of course, as I considered that, I started to wonder how many other women Jesse might have slept beside, all in the name of keeping them safe. It was with those thoughts that I turned the water to a cooler setting and attempted to settle myself down. There was absolutely no reason for me to become possessive of a man that would never be mine.
I quickly finished up in the shower, hopped out, and got myself dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt. It was winter in Pennsylvania, and that outfit was my go-to for lounging around and sleeping. Admittedly, it might have been nice to have something just a little cuter to wear, since Jesse would be seeing me in it. Unfortunately, that wasn’t an option, so this was going to have to cut it.
By the time I walked back into the bedroom, Jesse still hadn’t returned. Maybe the best thing for me to do would be to climb in and get myself to sleep before he got back. No matter how good my intentions might have been, it seemed fate had other plans.
I’d just made it to the side of the bed when Jesse came walking back in. And the way he did it was completely unacceptable.
“What are you doing?” I asked, my throat suddenly feeling very dry and scratchy.
“Pardon?”
