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I texted Emily from the parking lot and told her tonight wasn’t a good night. That we’d need to reschedule but that was a lie, too.
The whole thing was.
Me.
Her.
Us.
I rode home, anger rolling around my chest, an ache there I hadn’t experienced in more than a long while, the back of me achingly cold where my slugger usually warmed me.
“You have great tits.”
I ran my hands through Miranda’s wet hair in the sink of my kitchen and tried not to laugh. I could not, however, contain my eye roll.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I asked her with a smile, shook my wet hands off in her face, and she squealed before I threw a towel at her. “Dry your hair, you maniac.”
“What? They were right there in my face,” she said, laughing, sitting up and twisting the towel into her hair.
They had been in her face for the last ten minutes, while I’d washed her hair in my kitchen so that I could give her a trim in my dining room. I should have had her come to the salon, but she’d said she had wanted a haircut and to talk to me about something private and I’d figured the house would be the better place.
Miranda followed me into the dining room where I had a chair and all my stuff set up to cut her hair on the table. “So, fill me in on the latest with you and Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome,” she said, sitting down.
I took the towel off her head and ran my fingers through her thick hair, trying to decide how much I should tell her. We’d grown closer, sure, over the past couple of months of me being here, but I didn’t know if I wanted to pour my heart and soul out to her.
“Well,” I started, running a comb through her thick red hair. “We’re doing casual.”
“Casual dating or casual sex?”
I felt my eyebrows press together in confusion. “Is there a difference?”
“Maybe? I mean, I don’t know. I’ve never dated anyone casually really. I’ve also never had casual sex.”
I shook my head and laughed. “I’m pretty sure we’re just fuck buddies.”
“Interesting,” she said slowly.
I stopped brushing her hair to come around and look at her face. “What’s interesting?”
She shrugged, throwing her wet hair over her shoulder. “It just didn’t seem like y’all were only fuck buddies when he was over here fixing your truck a few weeks ago.”
I nodded slowly, moving around her to comb her hair again and start on her cut. It was true. I felt a lot of mixed signals, too, from Weston, but he’d made it clear that day in the salon. Friends with benefits.
Only I felt like we were maybe something more. But it scared me, so I tried not to focus on that too much. Besides, he’d canceled on me the other night at the last minute and I hadn’t heard from him since. I wasn’t exactly sure if we were anything at all anymore.
Maybe he was done with me.
It was the right thing. I wasn’t ready for anything serious either. I’d probably never be.
“We’re friends, too. Friends with benefits,” I said, making excuses for us.
I’d found myself justifying our relationship a lot lately. Mostly to myself.
“Okay,” she said softly. “I’m just glad you’re out there and having fun and that you’ve met someone who makes you feel good. Someone who can be there for you, besides me and Hold, that is. Because you know we are always there for you? Right?”
I grinned like a fool. Oh, if only she knew how good he made me feel.
“I do. Y’all have been really good to me and Parker, and we appreciate it so much. Really.” I wasn’t just saying that either. I meant it. I didn’t know what I would have done without them for this move and since, really.
