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My father bursts out with laughter, and my mother and I follow suit. TK just narrows his eyes up at me and shakes his head. “Priest’s a wimp,” he tells Harrison. “I could take him in a fight any day.”
“Whatever,” Harrison mutters, rolling his eyes.
After a few minutes, my mother goes back to the kitchen, putting together the finishing touches on our dinner, and I’m left alone to watch the boys work.
TK fits in here. He gets along with my father, and Harrison loves him. But is that enough to justify making this man give up his entire life to be with me?
He’d told me all about what going nomad means, how he would be unaffiliated with any one chapter, but still a member of the Black Hoods. He’d be giving up the brotherhood he has with the Austin chapter, as well as his home and his job.
And what do I have to give up in order for him to do that? Not a single thing, and that’s the part that doesn’t sit right with me.
What am I clinging to, my parents? My job? My zero close friendships?
My parents want me to be happy, and the rest of it doesn’t matter. So why am I insisting this man change it all for me?
That’s when I realize that I still don’t trust him. That there’s a small part of me sure that once he’s had his fill of me that he’ll go looking elsewhere. And if I had moved to Texas by then, where would that leave me and Jonas?
Maybe my mother spoke too soon when she mentioned how proud she was of my personal growth.
I’m being selfish. I’m still insecure, still keeping him at arm’s length so that I have a safety net in place if we don’t work out.
But where’s TK’s safety net?
He bends over to pick up a pile of wood. Harrison giggles and jumps on his back, his little arms winding around TK’s neck as he spins and twirls, pretending that he can’t shake him off.
He shouldn’t need a safety net. I should be his safety net, and he should be mine.
If I really love this man, I need to show him. I need to completely accept that he loves me for who I am, and stop waiting for him to change his mind.
TK looks up at me and grins, Harrison still dangling from his shoulders. “Tell your mom who the king is.”
“I’m the king!” Harrison giggles as TK shakes and jerks, giving my son a bumpy ride that sends his laughter into overdrive.
“Tell her,” TK orders.
“I’m the king!” Harrison squeals.
TK bends forward, tipping Harrison off of him and catching him in his arms. He pulls the boy closer, their noses nearly touching.
“Dude, you’re making me look bad in front of your mom,” TK tells him in a conspiratorial voice.
“My mom has a crush on you. She won’t notice that you look bad.”
TK closes his eyes and bites back his laugh. “Not the point, dude. Besides, I kinda have a crush on her too, a big one, so tell her that I’m the king, would ya?”
Harrison considers that for a moment and then turns his gaze to me and yells, “Momma, Jonas says he has a crush on you and that I have to lie to you and tell you that he’s the king.”
TK meets my gaze over Harrison’s head, and the both of us burst into peals of laughter. Even my father is guffawing.
“You’re killing me, kid.” TK says, cupping his face in his hands and pouting. “You’re killing me.”
“I don’t lie to my mom.”
TWATKNOT
Snuggling into my chest,Cora pulls up the sweat-soaked sheets to cover us both, our hearts still running like a bunch of wild mustangs.
“Fuck, baby.”
