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I swirled the brandy in my glass and watched the flames dancing in the fireplace. It was no wonder I was so intrigued by Miss Elizabeth. She was everything society said a woman should not be and yet exactly what I wanted. She was lively and bright and cheerful and honest. She was not afraid of a little sun on her skin or what anyone would think of her if she befriended a gardener. She was entirely her own person.
And I wished she would be mine.
I was playing a dangerous game. I was flirting with a woman I had no intention of proposing to, and if I was not careful, I would raise expectations. I would be a great catch for a woman like Miss Elizabeth. I was the only son and had already inherited. I had only one sister living with me and she was sweet and kind. My investments were sound, the coffers were full, and the estate was not entailed away from the female line. A lady could do far worse than Darcy of Pemberley.
You are certainly fond of yourself.
I scoffed at the voice in my head that told me I was over-confident. I thought nothing that was not true. Nothing I had not been told by countless others throughout my life. I had everything in my favor; I could choose who I liked.
Sounds like every lady’s dream. To be chosen by the Great Fitzwilliam Darcy.
I told the voice in my head to be quiet. The voice that sounded oddly like my cousin Richard. He was the only one in my family who would tell me I was not the most desirable bachelor ever to walk about London. He was constantly teasing me that it was my estate which was so desirable, not myself, and I should not let my head grow too large because of it.
One night, when we had drunk entirely too much brandy, he had told me that the one good thing about being the second son with very little money of his own was that when he chose to settle down, he would know the lady must actually like him. He needed a well-dowered bride, of course, but after the practical considerations, the most important thing he brought to the proverbial table was himself. An heiress did not need to marry at all. He was no great prize. Therefore, if such a woman did choose to marry him, he would know it was because she was genuinely fond of him.
Or he had gotten her with child, but then he would know she was fond of him already, would he not?
I sighed. Richard was hundreds of miles away and still he was tormenting me with his nonsensical arguments that made too much sense when I was tired and alone.
“Forgive me. I seem to have a habit of catching you unawares.”
I looked up from my brandy glass to see Miss Elizabeth a few feet away.
“Miss Elizabeth, I thought you had gone to bed.”
“I had, but I could not sleep and I did not wish to wake Jane. Mr. Bingley mentioned that there was a fire in the small parlor, so I thought I would read here for a time.”
I finally noticed the book in her hand.
“Please, sit.” I gestured to the chair across from me. “You are more than welcome.”
She looked about uncomfortably. “I do not wish to disturb you.”
I smiled at her in what I hoped was a friendly manner. “You are not disturbing me at all.” She still did not look convinced. “I shall not bite, Miss Elizabeth. Please, stay.”
She gave me a crooked smile and settled into the chair across from me. If I stretched out my leg, I would touch the hem of her gown.
“I cannot imagine you biting anyone, Mr. Darcy.”
She grinned, then realizing what she had said, her cheeks flushed pink and she cleared her throat. My cravat felt too tight and I shifted in my seat.
“Don’t let me keep you from your letter,” she said.
I had forgotten I was holding my latest letter from Richard. Perhaps that was why I had been thinking of him so much. I tucked it into my jacket pocket.
“It is an old letter I was rereading. My cousin Richard is on his way back from the Peninsula and I am anxious to see him again.”
“Are you close to him?”
“Very. He is the closest thing I have to a brother of my own. He also shares guardianship of my sister with me.”
“Your father must have trusted him a great deal.”
“He did. Richard has that effect on people. There is something about him that sets others at ease. One simply knows there is nothing he cannot handle. A desirable quality in a leader.”
“I imagine it is a useful skill in that position.”
I nodded, swirling the brandy in my glass. “When we were boys, he would always lead our games. It was the two of us and a few other children from the estate. Richard would organize us into groups according to our skills and we would have mock battles in the fields around Pemberley.”
