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That night will forever stay with me. Haunt me. The nightmares I still have where she inhales broken breaths while blood spurts from her chest visit me every damn night. But the moment they wrenched her from my arms, the flicker of hope I had for the short time she was in my life went out, never to be lit again. It was something I had to come to terms with.
A memory assaults me as the road darkens, turning black before my very eyes.
“Dr-Drake,” she sputters in blood from her lips. It makes her look deathly beautiful. I lean in, planting a kiss on her mouth, tasting the metallic liquid. I know he’s watching. He knew I’d fallen for her. And this is his lesson. I’m not allowed to feel.
All she is now is a pretty, broken toy. There’s nothing left, her body draining itself in front of me.
“I-I lo-loved you.” Her words are filled with emotion. The real, heart-stopping kind. I nod. I know she did, but the problem is I was too focused on revenge, and I’d forgotten that all we needed was each other to get through the dark. Not even Dante knew. She was mine. My secret.
I wanted to steal her away, and instead, I’m stuck here without her. “You need to close your eyes now, Caia. I’ll find you. I’ll save you.” My words are low. I don’t want him to hear me, but when Malcolm drops to his knees beside her, she glances back and forth between us.
It takes everything inside me to not attack him for doing this, but when I look at what I’ve turned into, I know it was the only choice. I would’ve killed her in my madness. With the sickness riddling my brain, there’s no telling what I could have put her through.
“This is for the best, son.” He slaps a hand on my shoulder as if he’s just told me he’s proud of me. Perhaps he is. Maybe he’s not angry at all and he’ll forget that my plan to stop them from hurting her would’ve jeopardized everything he worked so hard for. I was supposed to be the good son, but instead, I’m going to be the one who turns into him, the monster I’ve spent my life hating.
I watch as one of my father’s guards lifts her limp form in his arms, and jealousy rages through me. I saw him with her. In the darkness of her cell, I watched how he hurt her, and I didn’t do anything to save her. Guilt surges through me. She didn’t know I was there, watching from the shadows as he took her, again and again.
Eighteen, and she’s dead because I couldn’t stop myself from loving her. Our game has ended, and we both lost. There’ll be no more talking, touching, me watching her.
“I love you, Caia. Even in this darkness,” I whisper to her, my lips not moving, so only I know what I’ve uttered. Her body jerks, blood oozes from her, and I watch as the white button-up the asshole wears is drenched in it. The pretty crimson fluid that I’ve reveled in so many times now flows from the one woman I love.
That emotion will never again take anything from me. Because I will never give my heart to another. I’ll never let anyone get close enough to see my now-blackened heart. As the life finally dissipates from her eyes, I vow that my emotions will die with Caia. My heart will be buried in her hands, with no chance of being recovered.
Shaking my head, hoping to rid the memory from the forefront of my mind, I make the left turn leading to the large monstrosity sitting on the hill overlooking the city.
The gates are lit by two yellow gargoyle lamps which illuminate the lions’ heads on the ebony metal. Since the house sits outside the city, there are no other lights for miles.
Enveloped in darkness, the three-floor mansion looms over hills of greenery. A buzzer sits at the entrance to the drive, beckoning me to make contact. Inhaling a steadying breath, I push the button, and a camera appears in the black screen.
“Yes?” a deep, gruff tone comes in greeting from the speaker.
“Mr. Savage to see Mr. Thanos,” I tell him. A soft buzzing sounds through the speaker, and the large iron gates slide open, allowing me entrance to Hell. This is the one place that’s always left me with a sense of forbidding. I know what happens behind the high walls. I’ve seen the dinner parties and poker evenings run by Thanos and my father. Anxiety grips my chest painfully at the memories that flit through my mind as I am granted entrance.
The driveway is long. It offers me the chance to remember the times we’d come here. As it winds, I realize this could be the last time I drive up to this place. Dante and I will shut down everything my father had built. When I finally get a glimpse of the house, all the lights shimmer like a beacon, and I wonder what exactly awaits me on the other side of those walls.
