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“You must get into clubs and bars easily. You’re built for sin, and even I can see it,” Bridget says with a smirk. “There’s no way you’re nineteen.” They laugh again and move back to the mirrors.
Her words make black spots appear behind my eyes as panic begins to claw at me. I take a seat and try to breathe, but the flashbacks are rushing in.
I’m sittingbeside him as I sing my solo for Sunday’s service. He leers at me in a way that's starting to make me feel uncomfortable, and his hand pushes up my skirt, digging his nails into the flesh of my thigh. My words halt and I gasp, turning to him with watery, panicked eyes.
He gives me a smile. One I’ve seen many times before to put me at ease, but now I’m seeing the truth. This man is dangerous.
“Pretty little hummingbird,” he coos, leaning down to press his lips to my throat. My pulse is racing and I’m trembling. He groans into my skin.
“Your body was built to tempt a man into sinning. Can you blame me for wanting a bite of the apple?”
A locker doorslams from the row behind me and I jolt back to the present. I don’t hear anything as I climb to my feet and rush out to the hall. I don’t watch where I’m going. I need to get to my room. I reach the staircase leading to the apartment and almost trip over Bastian. It looks like he’s been waiting for me.
“So, I take it she said no? Bummer,” he says with a playful smile on his face.
“What?” It takes me a minute to understand what he’s talking about. “Oh, I never got to ask. She was in a meeting,” I say, still shaken up about what I heard in my grandmother’s office, and about how Bridget treated me in gym class. “Sorry, I’ll try and ask her tonight, but I have to go. I’ll see you around, Bastian.” I move around him, accidentally knocking into him and start up the steps.
“Oh, that’s cool. I guess I’ll see ya later,” he says then walks off looking upset. My hands start to shake and I know I’m about to start crying. I want to call out to him, to apologize, but what good would it do? Maybe I shouldn’t make friends after all. I’m too damaged to do this. All I’ll end up doing is hurting them.
Chapter10
Ipass Bastian in the hall on my way back from class. History was brutal, and now we have a paper on top of everything else I need to do this week. He seems upset, but won’t stop to tell me what’s wrong. He races down the steps wearing workout clothes, so I decide to leave him be for the moment. He’s probably going underground to hit something, or maybe to spar with Levi.
I reach our dorm and there's a crash from inside. What the hell? Has everyone lost their minds today? I slam open the door and Ash is pacing while having a tantrum. There is a bookcase that he’s tipped over in his fit of rage.
“What the fuck, Ash?” I yell, as I walk in and start to fix the mess.
“Who does she think she is?” Ash starts to rant the moment he sees me. I don’t know what crawled up his ass, but he’s raging right now. I place the books back on the shelf, then grab my football from the table and toss it to him. This is one of the ways we have learned to calm him down when he’s not able to hit the bag, or spar with Levi. He needs to work out his frustrations by being active, but he can’t lately because of his wrist injury, and so his temper is getting worse.
He’s always had a short fuse when his temper is lit, and this prevents Bast and me from getting a black eye.
“She’s everywhere, man. I see her in the halls, people are talking about her, and I can’t get away from it. She is in all of my classes. All day, I've had to hear about the new girl from you two assholes, and even in the locker room, the guys were going on about her. What is so fucking special about her? Yeah, she's hot, but she's also a Cross. So it's not like she's the type to bend over and let you fuck her fat ass. And what is it with all the damn blushing? I'm a virgin and I don't blush at the drop of a hat.” He continues to rant. I open my mouth to interrupt him, but he’s not having it.
“There is just something about her that irritates me. Her musical laugh. The way she smells like a blackberry pie with vanilla ice cream…” Ash trails off, and I bite my lip. He's just as bad as me and Bastian. He just won't admit it.
I snort, and he turns to me with his fists clenched and nostrils flaring. “Ash, you need to calm down. It’s just a crush. Bast knows how important initiating into the Locked Souls is to us. He’s not going to break his vow, no matter how gorgeous Chastity is. I’m not either, for that matter.”
I try to talk my best friend down, knowing him as well I do, his anger can lead to trouble and possibly end up in a punishment. He snorts and throws the football harder at me. I catch it with a grunt, then drop it to shake out my wrist.
“Dude, chill,” I snap, and turn to sit on the couch. “She’s just a pretty girl with a sweet smile and kind face. She’s not the antichrist, here to devour your soul, or whatever insane thoughts you’re thinking.” He snorts and turns to his bedroom.
“I hope you’re right, Jonas,” he mutters, not turning to look at me before he walks into his room. I groan and run my fingers through my curly hair, then stand and head to my room to get ready.
I change into a pair of academy-issued sweats and a T-shirt, while he continues to pace and grumble in his room. I have to get to the weight room for training, and was hoping to have a chat with Jules. When I exit my room, Ash is outside my door.
“Are you going to be there for dinner tonight? Or are you having another late night rendezvous with her?” he sneers, and I’m just about done for right now.
“I have practice, then a paper, so I’ll see you later. You might want to figure your shit out before it ends up biting you in the ass, Ash.” I don’t wait for his response. I leave him to his pissy attitude. Maybe Bast can talk him off the ledge whenever he gets home. I have shit to do.
I leave the apartment and walk downstairs to the door that leads outside into the courtyard. It’s a cool night so there aren't many people around. I sit on my favorite bench overlooking the fountain and pull out my phone to call home. I still have about ten minutes until I have to meet Coach, Miles, and Elias to lift weights. Honestly, I’m so pissed off, after talking to Ash, that I’m glad I have an outlet for it. The rest of the team are watching old tapes in preparation for our big game against Blessed Trinity. Man, I really want to pummel their prissy asses into the mud this time. We lost by three points in the last scrimmage, and they have never let us forget.
I pull up Jules' name on my phone and hit call. It rings a few times, and I’m about to hang up when I hear her answer. “Hey, Sis,” I say. I'm shocked I actually reached her. Lately she's been staying over at her friend’s house a lot. I know things at home haven't been great, but I'm working to change that. Just need to get through this initiation. Then I can move her out here, so I can keep a closer eye on her.
She needs someone she can depend on, and our father isn’t that person. Since our mother died, he’s either there physically but checked out mentally, or he’s gone off on one of his ‘magical benders’, that can last a few weeks or even months.
“Hey, Jo,”she whispers, and I’m immediately on edge.
“I can hear in your voice that something’s going on… want to tell your big brother what’s up?” I keep my tone light, but my chest clenches, knowing whatever it is will be bad and I’m nowhere near her to help.
