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For some reason, I missed her so much in that moment. When all of a sudden, Dad was sitting beside me with his feet next to mine.
“I’m so sorry, Daddy. I feel horrible about what you were feeling last night. I can only imagine what you were going through.”
Again, he shocked the shit out of me when he asked, “Does he make you happy?”
I jerked back, peering at him.
He lovingly smiled at me. “I wasn’t born yesterday, Haven.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Why did you defend me if you think I’m lying too?”
“Baby, I don’t think. I know.”
“What do you know?”
“I know you’re hardly around anymore. You’re always staying out with Cove. Honey, I recognize the look in your eyes. It’s same one your mom had for me.”
I could feel the tears begin pooling in my gaze. We didn’t ever speak about her like this.
“My baby girls in love.”
“Daddy, I’m sorry I lied to you.”
“Are you being safe?”
We locked stares.
“This isn’t an easy conversation for me to have with you, Haven. You’re my baby girl. You’ll always be my baby girl. This is definitely a discussion you should be having with your mother, but she’s not here and I’m not ready to be a grandfather yet.”
Tears slid out of my eyes, knowing it was hard for him to look at me like I wasn’t his little girl anymore.
“Daddy, it’s not like that. He respects me. Trust me, it’s the last thing he wants.”
He wiped my tears away. “It’s like I blinked and overnight you turned into this beautiful woman I couldn’t be prouder of. You’ve never given me any problems like your brothers have. You’ve always been my good baby girl. I thank God every day for you.” He paused, allowing his words to sink in.
“From the first time I held you in my arms, I knew you’d be special. I didn’t realize what that was until I didn’t have your momma anymore. You remind me so much of her and I know God sent you to me to give me strength on how to live without her.”
Tears freely fell down my face. There was no stopping them.
“Watching you grow up into everything we ever wanted has been one of the biggest joys of my life, Haven. I couldn’t imagine a life without you in it.”
I felt the weight of his words in the pit of my stomach.
“After years, when I look at you, that scar on your eyebrow doesn’t cause me pain anymore. If anything, it’s helped me heal. You and your brothers are our biggest accomplishments and you’re the only reasons I survived losing the love of my life.”
“Daddy…” I wept. “I miss her so much.”
“I know, baby.”
He pulled me into his side, kissing the top of my head. “I thought… Jesus, Haven… I thought I lost you too and if I had, I wouldn’t have survived it. I can’t lose both my girls.”
“I’m sorry. Please forgive me. The last thing I want is for you to go through what you did last night.”
“Who is this guy that my Teeny’s in love with?”
I smiled. “I never understood how people would say you fall for men that are like your father and that’s the case here. He’s a lot like you. Quiet. Revered. Stubborn. Protective. The list goes on with how much he reminds me of you. The way you’d look at Momma is the way he looks at me, Daddy.”
“He’s damn lucky to have you. Does he know that?”
“I think so.”
“How did you meet him?”
“Just around.”
“Is he in college?”
“No.”
“How old is he?”
“Older.”
“How much older, Haven?”
“Don’t worry. I don’t have Daddy issues.” I half-smiled. “He’s not your age.”
He chuckled. “Does he treat you good?”
“Yes.”
“Does he love you?”
“Yes.”
“If he hurts you, you know we’ll kill him, right?’
I nodded, smiling that time. “I do.”
“He know that?”
“He’s aware.”
“Am I going to meet him soon?”
“I hope so.”
“There’s something you’re not telling me. I can feel it.”
I didn’t know how much I could actually share with my dad. I was scared of saying the wrong thing.
Instead, I simply stated, “He’s complicated.”
“Most men are.”
“From what I gather, he didn’t have the best childhood. Him and his father don’t really get along that great. There’s a lot of bad history there.”
“And his mother?”
I shrugged. “He doesn’t talk about her. He doesn’t really talk about himself that much. He’s always invested in my life though. Wants to know everything about me. Listens intently to everything I say. I’ve never met anyone like him. From the second we met—I’ve felt this deep connection to him. Like we’ve known each other all our lives.”
“I felt like that with your mom. It’s a beautiful feeling.”
“It’s kind of scary too.”
“It can be, but I know you’re a good judge of character. You know the difference between right and wrong. I trust your judgement.”
