Page 72 of Lock and Key


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His brows pulled together, questioning me. “Now I’m the one who doesn’t understand. Unless… alimony?”

I set my spoon down and let out a snort of laughter. “Lord knows I could have gotten a lot there,” I mumbled. Following a beat of silence as I pulled myself together, I explained, “Tom comes from an extremely wealthy family. And when he and I got married, there was no prenuptial agreement. As you know, my dream had always been to have a family, and Tom knew that. So, we both agreed that instead of me getting a job only to quit down the road after we started having children, I merely volunteered. This way, I found a way to spend some of my days doing something meaningful, but at least there wouldn’t be a business that would be depending on me long term.”

“Alright. So, what happened?” Jack wondered.

“Well, again, without a prenup, I’m sure I had options,” I began again. “But I was never with Tom for his money. I didn’t want his money. Fortunately for me, ever since my grandma passed, I’ve had the inheritance she left me, an inheritance that was healthily padded by my grandpa’s death years earlier. So while I don’t have the wealth that Tom’s family does, I’m still in a unique position to be able to stay home and not work. It’s not that I don’t like working. In fact, I loved the volunteer work I did at the hospital and the library. But I’m incredibly grateful that I’m fortunate enough to have what I do from my grandparents, because it gave me the opportunity to come here and heal without needing to depend on Tom for anything.”

A proud smile washed over Jack’s face, and I had to wonder if it was because I’d indicated I didn’t want any lasting connection to Tom or if it was because he realized I wouldn’t be leaving any time soon to ‘head into the office’ for work. He never said, and in the end, I had a feeling it was a bit of both.

Of course, in sharing all that I did, I was able to draw one conclusion. I’d learned a bit before we’d had that conversation that Jack was pretty much retired. He’d made plenty of money when he worked on Wall Street, and now he was able to live comfortably off that without having to worry.

While I knew it was still far too soon for either one of us to get caught up in anything permanent, I thought that Jack and I were both in a place where we recognized the importance of family.

Sure, things were nice to have, but stuff didn’t mean anything if you had nobody. Jack and I had both learned that in very different ways, but the lesson was still the same.

The reality was that after my grandma had passed and I lost the only blood relative I had left—even if my biological parents were still alive—I took time to travel. I didn’t have a plan, there was no specific destination, and I think it was a very real indication of how lost I felt in my life. I was out there, searching for something, and though I’d seen a lot, it was sad to say that I’d gone back home not having found anything.

For a few years, I’d worked odd jobs just to have something to do, but I often got bored or felt unfulfilled.

So, being here now and having gone through what I did with Tom, I had to admit that I liked the idea of considering what a future with Jack might look like given the unique position we were both in, financially speaking.

Because it would give us a chance.

We could have so much more of what we had over the last several weeks.

We could have fun every day. We could go out snowshoeing and snowmobiling in the winter months, just like we’d already done. There was so much excitement in store for us when the weather warmed up, too. And if things went to a place that I think we both hoped they’d eventually go, I knew we’d both be delighted to share these experiences with a child or two.

Because there were no bones about it. Jack was a family man.

I loved that.

I adored it.

But today, it was that very thing that was causing me to feel so much stress and anxiety.

Jack and I were going to be leaving the cabins in his truck, and he was going to be taking me to have a family dinner at his parents’ place with all of his siblings and their significant others.

I’d have been content for Jack and I to stay in our isolated little bubble forever, but I knew that wasn’t realistic. I knew this was important for us to do, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t terrified about it.

Because this was how it started the last time. Things had been good between Tom and me—admittedly, even at their best, though, they weren’tthisgood—and once I met his family, everything started on a downward trajectory.

I didn’t want that to happen with Jack.

I’d be devastated if it did.

But these people, his parents and his siblings, had been there for him through what had to have been the worst time in his life. What if they decided they didn’t like me much? Or, worse yet, what if they pretended to like me at first only to change their minds down the line? What if they looked at me as a sub-par replacement for the woman he’d loved and tragically lost?

God, I couldn’t go through it again.

I couldn’t handle being constantly berated for not being the woman they wanted me to be, for not being the woman they wished was standing there beside their son.

“You look like you’re not feeling well,” Jack said, walking into the bedroom to see me pacing back and forth. “Are you okay?”

I came to a stop in front of him and shook my head.

Immediately, he brought his hand to my forehead and held it there. “I don’t think you have a fever. Are you feeling sick? I can call my parents and cancel.”

Just like that.

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