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“Don’t get smart with me. Alex is his son, and we all want what’s best for Jordan. He needs a break. He’ll get it. Now, excuse me. I’m craving my men, and I don’t need to be around your energy right now.” Kamila’s full height intimidated me. She got up from her seat, staring down at me. “I didn’t know doctors wore dresses to work. Fix that. What’s wrong with you?”
I tugged at my dress, embarrassed at my appearance.
“Ivy? Please, little doe. Talk to me,” Jordan urges me, dragging me into the present. Kamila came into my office earlier today, and I’ve been spiraling ever since.
I can’t muster enough courage to talk to him. Ask him about his ex-wife. Explain my absence at dinner.
As I sit next to him with a bag of hot food on my lap, I try to count my blessings, but I can’t see them through the blur I’m facing.
“Eat, Ivy.”
“I can’t. I’ll shit or throw up all over your car,” I warn him. The heat coming off the paper bag on my lap irks me. My stomach growls, but I know I won’t be able to hold it down. I haven’t had proper food in almost two days.
“I wish you would.”
“You really don’t,” I insist, laughing dryly.
“Little doe, this car means shit to me. I want you to look like yourself again. You’re shaking, and you’re starved.” He leans over to my side, opening up the paper bag on my lap. “Will it help if I feed you?”
I shake my head, and I turn away from him.
“Don’t cry. I’ve had a rough day and night, little doe. You have, too. Don’t waste your precious energy crying,” he urges me.
“I thought you liked my tears.”
“I love your tears. I love them so much that I crave them. I could make a diet out of your tears, and I’d be well-fed for the rest of my days, little doe. But I won’t. I need you to get back to normal. You’re fading….” The worry in his tone is honest, a vulnerable moment that I get to keep for myself. “You’re fading, and I won’t have that. You’re mine now.”
“I’m really not, aren’t I,” I blurt out.
“I’ll give you anything you need,” he vows. He’s waving a fry in front of my face, challenging me to part my lips for him. I don’t. “I’m done pleasing them. They dared to kick me out. I don’t care if this shit burns down….”
Jordan doesn’t mean the bitter words that leave his mouth. He’s too invested to want Katantia to burn. But right now? It’ll help him save face. I give him that.
“This is a blessing,” I comment.
“How so?”
“It’s the vacation you’ve been yearning for.” I think about what Kamila said in my office today.He needs a break. He’ll get it.
“That doesn’t sound like me,” he says, taking a bite from his burger. Juices slide down his chin, and suddenly, I want to lick at him, lap it all up with my curious tongue. He eats with elegance in front of me, but the burger’s so juicy that he loses the battle. His fingers are greasy now, and I can’t stop staring at him for being right here with me.
“I hope you were lying earlier.”
“About?”
“You staying in your car.”
He licks his lips, and my eyes trace the movement with hunger. “It’s my truth.”
I shudder. He must be as exhausted as I am if he’s been staying in this goddamn car. It’s spacious, but Jordan’s a big man. He does big things. He needs his downtime. “You shouldn’t stay in your car.”
“How else am I going to keep an eye on my needy little doe?” Fuck. His words make me wet. I would let him stalk me all over again. As long as his eyes are watching, I’d do anything for my new favorite drug. His attention, affection, and protection.
“You could stay with me,” I suggest. Unless you’re still in love with your ex, and you want her back, that is.
“Why do you say it like that? There’s a but somewhere in that suggestion,” Jordan claims, studying my face for hints. I take a deep breath, and I realize that we can’t play games. I’ve got a situation with Hugh, and Jordan’s family has kicked him out. If we’re allies, we should work together.
“Kamila said you’re still pining over your ex,” I blurt out, avoiding his reaction. Images of Jordan, his ex-wife, and his son proudly taking pictures at his championship celebration flood my mind. I stash the food on the dashboard, and I hoist my legs back up against my chest. I hug myself for comfort.
