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“Thank you.”
It was surreal to see Grant again after all these years.
Considering how things ended between the two of us, I hadn’t known what to expect when I recognized him. Years ago, when Taylor first set the two of us up, sparks had flown, and I had pictured a future with him. Although I’d never forgotten about Bernard or our night together, I’d known that I needed to move on.
And I had hoped Grant would be the kind of man and father we needed.
Unfortunately, when Grant received the offer to transfer, he’d taken it and had left without looking back. Since he hadn’t been ready for a baby, I hadn’t held him accountable, not when I knew what a big responsibility it was.
But I did resent him for a while.
Especially because he’d gotten my hopes up before crushing them.
“Listen, I’m glad I’m running into you because I wanted to apologize.”
I dabbed at my eyes and coughed. “What are you talking about?”
“I wasn’t fair to you when we were dating,” Grant responded with a wince. “I know that helping to raise a baby freaked me out, but I shouldn’t have left the way I did. You deserved better.”
I stood up straighter and balled the tissue up. “It’s okay. I know you were scared.”
“I was, but it’s not okay. I’m sorry. I would like to make it up to you if you let me.”
I gave him a small smile. “That’s not necessary.”
“I insist. Can I buy you some coffee or something while we wait for Taylor?”
I cleared my throat. “I’d like that.”
Chapter 21: Closer
Rachel
“I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but things are going to be okay.”
I blew my nose before tossing the tissue into the bin. “How? How are things going to be okay?”
It had been days since my argument with Bernard, and I felt worse and worse about it with each passing day. Not only had he not spoken to me directly during our interactions, but he was also careful to leave a wide berth of space between us when we interacted. Sitting across from him during our meals was a slow form of torture, and I hated every minute of it.
But I had no idea how to make things better.
Nor was I sure I wanted to.
I couldn’t be the only one fighting for us.
More and more, I was beginning to wonder if Bernard regretted bringing me into his life. Wanting to be a part of his son’s life was one thing. Getting involved with me, the mother of his child, was another, and I had ignored every warning sign and the voice in my head telling me it was going to complicate things.
Why hadn’t I just listened to my instincts?
Bernard clearly wasn’t ready to commit to me.
And I was forced to interact with him on a daily basis for Ron’s sake.
Thankfully, Ron hadn’t noticed anything strange or forced about our interactions. Every morning, while we went through the motions, I kept glancing over at my son and wondering if I was doing right by him. While I wanted him to have a family like the one I never had growing up, I also knew I needed to set a good example for him.
Pretending that nothing had changed between Bernard and me wasn’t the way to do it. Already, it was taking its toll on me in more ways than one, and some nights I found myself pacing the length of my apartment and listening for the sound of footsteps outside the door. And whenever we dropped Bernard off at work, I held my breath, half-expecting to see Carla pop out of the bushes and make a beeline for him.
I couldn’t keep living like this.
