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I exhale, a weight lifting off my shoulders now that my brother knows. It killed me to keep it from him for so long. But it doesn’t matter. Not anymore.
“I’m sorry, Anders. I should have told you.”
“You are my sister. And he’s my best mate. The fact you both kept it from me stings a bit. And not because you went behind my back. But because you didn’t think you could trust me with the truth.” He lowers his voice as he runs his hands down my arms.
“Remember the promise we made to each other when Uncle Nicholas died? How we vowed to always be honest with each other? To always trust each other with our secrets, no matter what?”
“I thought…” I shake my head, at a loss for words, which seems to be the norm these days. “I don’t know what I thought. It doesn’t matter. It’s over now.” I push past him and walk toward the window, the entire city out to celebrate the founding of our country.
“You sure about that?” Anderson asks, his voice filled with skepticism.
“Of course I am.” I face him, shoulders squared. “In case you missed the memo, Jameson will be proposing tonight. And I’ll be accepting.”
He steps toward me. “Is that what you want?”
“It doesn’t matter what I want.” I look away as another lump lodges in my throat. “He told me he loves me,” I say wistfully, fighting back the tears threatening to fall at the memory. I should have been so happy to hear those words.
Instead, it only made our circumstances even more painful.
“I know,” he replies, not even asking about whom I’m referring. He doesn’t need to.
“You do?” I dart my eyes to his as he approaches.
“He’s had a thing for you for years, Ezzy.”
“He asked me to run away with him. Leave this life. Start over again.”
“And you turned him down.”
“What choice did I have?” I choke out. “It’s not as easy as he made it sound. Not for me. I can’t abandon you.”
“Esme…” He grips my biceps. “You wouldn’t be abandoning me. I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself. And while I find some of the things about this life abhorrent, I also know it’s much harder to change things from the outside.” He holds my arms tighter. “You may think you’re powerless to do anything, considering certain members of the royal household like to pretend they’re in control, but you’re not powerless, Esme. You’ve always had a choice. As long as you’re willing to stand up for it.
“All your life, I’ve watched you stand up for everyone else. Minorities. The poor. Children. You name it. So long as it’s not some rich, white man, you lend your voice to their cause.” He pauses, tone softening. “When are you going to stand up for yourself? When are you going to lend your voice to Esme’s cause?”
“Anders, I—”
A loud throat clearing cuts through the space. I look toward the doorway, Adam standing there in his dark suit, expression stoic, as always. But there’s something different about him. I can’t help but notice some redness along his jaw, his bottom lip swollen a bit.
“Your Highnesses.” He bows slightly before directing his attention toward me. “Are you ready to go?”
“Of course,” I reply, although I doubt I’ll ever be ready for what awaits me at tonight’s gala.
“Then we should be on our way. Don’t want you to be late.”
“Certainly not.” I lift my eyes toward Anderson’s, wishing I’d find the answer I need within his blue orbs. What I wouldn’t give for my mother to still be alive. To wrap me in my arms and tell me what to do. To assure me I’m on the right path.
Leaning down, my brother presses a soft kiss to my temple. “No matter what, I’ll always support you.”
I close my eyes, his assurance exactly what I need right now. “Thank you, Anders.”
“Love ya, Esme.”
“Love you, too.” I hold his gaze, grateful to have a brother as understanding and level-headed as him. Then I pull back and walk toward Adam, following him out of my apartment and into the SUV waiting to take me to the palace.
And my future with Jameson Gates.
But as I look out the window at the palace lights in the distance, I question whether this is the future I actually want for myself.
